you know. Sometimes in my heart I feel a chill. It's not just a feeling. It's inside of me trying to tell me. I sometimes see Jesus standing in the corner of the room. That's when I am really unexpecting ANYTHING at all. Then when I notice what I see it disappears as if I hallucinated. When I feel a deep chill I see something monstrous sometimes. But I dont hear any sound. All I see sometimes are just some type of dark, shadowy figure. Sometimes all I see are two crimson, red, and bloody eyes. THe eyes that look so devilish drives me to fear. Again just like Jesus, it looks like hallucination. I always hear some taps when no one, or any object is moving. Not even water falling or myself. I hear taps and sometimes whispers. I know I'm not crazy because some of my friends can hear it too but those friends of mine have gone through pain and are trying to get back on track with God. What is this fear? I've never even spoken or thought about this topic that much but now I am filled with curiousity AND fear at the same time. I know I don't possess some second sight kind of thing because I believe trying to contact with the "spirit world" is wrong and so is fortune telling. I know I'm not insane because I can feel it deep in my heart, trying to rip out to the surface. I know this is not just some imagination or anything. This doesn't happen after a horro movie or religious movie or anything. It just... comes out. Say I'm watching something... weird like... Pokemon for example (this is the only show i can think of at the moment cuz its my friends buddy icon) The TV is in front of me, im watching and I see something or soemone walking sometimes. This happened only once. When I'm riding a car and drive by this park in Teaneck there is a huge boulder. I see a figure sitting on it looking at me. Again I dont notice it at first but when I do it disappears. What is this?? What's wrong with me? This doesn't happen very often but it still happened. I know that some people have paralysis in their sleep and hear AND see demons or devils or ghost, or anything frightening. I'm not parylized at the moment and I'm perfectly normal. Is this something God is trying to do to show me something or is it Satan driving me insane?

-- JoeKP (joekinplaya@gmail.com), February 18, 2005

Answers

I dabbled in the occult. For the next few years of my life I had weird experiences and visions... i didn't attribute these things to my dabbling because I didn't know a thing about spiritual matters. A blanket was ripped off of me as I woke up, when i wrote or drew something, it would disappear off of my stack of paper (no one was in the house, the writings and drawings inderneath the first page were intact, i could have done this myself under some type of possession? who knows), something would poke me in the back when no one was around or kick my car seat when i was driving, when i moved out of my house, my nextdoor neighbor (in a duplex), told me of strange happenings in her house after i moved ( i NEVER told her of my experiences so it's not like she could have been feeding off of me).

the worst one was the vision. i was meditating, (the bad kind, not contemplating God but mindlessly meditating) outside in the dark. i heard clicking in my neighbor's driveway. i thought is was their dog. i looked, nothing there. but then i saw it. it was a "shadow", but blacker than black, in the shape of a man. it stood there, making the dog nail clicking noise. a fear gripped my heart and then the shadow disappeared in this weird way that i can not attribute to any natural causes, not because i blinked, not because i turned my head, but as i looked at it, it kind of melted and warped.

I went to a psychic sometime later for the fun of it with my sister in law. The psychic said that the shadow was like a helping spirit and I shouldn't be afraid it it. Ha.

Later, after I became a Christian, the horrendous dreams started. There was a spiritual problem for sure, and I finally recognized it. After asking for forgiveness for dabbling in the occult and renouncing (rebuking?- don't know the proper term) the devil or any demons from messing with me and asking God to guard my mind from evil dreams, I've been fine ever since. When I have a problem now that I know for sure does not stem from my sin, but from an outside source, I can recognize it now instead of living in fear of it.

And just to answer your question with a question... do you think that God would want you to be paralyzed with fear by showing you strange looking things?

-- Rina (emailmarina@yahoo.com), February 19, 2005.

I just reread your post and I have to add something.

When i was 5 I had to sleep on the floor one night cuz our beds were gone (we were moving). I wasn't afraid... but then all of a sudden this thought popped in my head that the devil was going to get me. My heart was thumping and I wanted to jump up and run out of there. But this vision popped in my head, that the devil's arms were coming up through the floor and trapping my legs.

So when I tried to get up, I couldn't. I just lay there, fearing for my life. And then I prayed in my little heart with the little knowledge of God that I had that I could escape. All of a sudden, the devil disappeared and I could get up and run downstairs into my mother's arms.

I know this doesn't exactly compare to your visions, but in light of my little story, can you see that maybe these things you see are not from God?

-- Rina (emailmarina@yahoo.com), February 19, 2005.

do you something important to fight for? Something you cherish... do you fight for them? I am only able to fight for something that'll feel depressed if I lose a certain battle. I can't just do things like all Christians can do. I am weak at heart because I cannot fight for something I cherish. I fight for something that I do not really love. I cannot be strong. I don't know how to pray and turn to God at times of despair. I always lose the fight.

-- JoeKP (joekinplaya@gmail.com), February 22, 2005.

Joe, i really pity your situation because prayer will get you everywhere. If you forget how to pray in moments of distress, you must feel like you're all alone.

There is hope for you my friend.

I hope this helps...

When you are in dispair, when you are afraid, "what" is it that you forget to pray? is it a formal prayer that you have memorized that slips your mind when you are stressed? is it that you don't pray very often and there don't have "practice?" Don't feel inadequate. Just talk to God.

He doesn't need to hear an eloquent speech, he wants to hear the desires of your heart. Lord, I am so scared, please help me. Simple and to the point. Lord, I am feeling trapped and I don't know how to get out, please lead me. Lord, what am I doing? Help me to focus on you and stop this sin before it starts. Lord, I feel that my mind is filled with evil things, help me to take every thought captive and not dwell on the evil, take these thoughts from me. Lord, I'm seeing evil things again... if i see them because i'm knee deep in sin, forgive me of ____, if i see them because this is a direct spiritual attack then guard my heart from this evil, give me your peace that surpasses all understanding, edify me when I am feeling weak.

Rebuke the evil in your life. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.

This isn't like some formal thought out plan for you to follow. It is an example of things that you can do, simple things, that may help you, as they have helped me and countless others. Understand that prayer is key to all of this, because it is you speaking with your heavenly Creator who wants you to live a blessed life whatever trials may befall you. Start small and simple and continue to grow. When you start to pray "little" prayers, you'll get comfortable talking to God and you'll find yourself talking to Him more often.

-- Rina (emailmarina@yahoo.com), February 23, 2005.