I am looking for advice or guidance with reagards to being falsely accused of abuse by my ex-wife. It did not happen during our marriage. The divorce was final early 2001 and this was never a topic during those procedings. Now she has taken me back to court and has been fighting for full custody of our 3 boys. In the divorce, custody was granted 50/50. There was a legal guardian appointed to meet with her, the 3 children and I. My ex wife lied to the guardian about all this. Without any investigations or other interviews, the guardian believed me ex wife. I am in Rhode Island and need any legal advice or any adovcate groups available to assist me with this. I do not know which way to turn. Thank You Very Much ! Glen

-- Anonymous, October 31, 2002

Answers

Contact Dean Tong at www.abuse-excuse.com and retain him. Follow every thing he tells you to do and you will do as well as any human with testicles can do in a gender bias system. Remember, they will always assume you are abusive because you are a man. Write everything down, keep a daily journal and protect yourself from any further allegations by making sure you are NEVER alone with this woman.

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2002

TRY TO TELL AS MANY PEOPLE ABOUT HER LIES AS POSSIBLE. EXPOSE THE LIES, RECORD ANY INCOMING OR OUTGOING MESSAGES ON YOUR PHONE. GET CALLER ID AND HAVE YOUR ANSWERING MACHINE RECORD ANY MESSAGES SHE LEAVES YOU. IF POSSIBLE, HAVE SOMEONE ACCOMPANY YOU WITH ANY TRANSFER WITH THE CHILDREN. ALSO, POINT OUT THAT NONE OF WHAT YOUR BEING ACCUSED OF WAS PART OF THE COURT RECORD. IF NECESSARY, TAKE OUT A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST HER. DEPENDING ON THE AGE OF YOUR CHILDREN IT MAY BECOME NECESSARY TO OBTAIN STATEMENTS FROM THEM. IF NONE OF THIS TOOK PLACE DURING YOR MARRIAGE, IT SHOULD BE EASY ENOUGH TO PROVE THAT HER MOTIVES ARE FALSE AND SELF SERVING. IF YOU ARE NOT GUILTY OF THIS, THAN YOU ARE IN THE RIGHT, AND THAT SHOULD BE EASY TO DEFEND. ALSO, YOU COULD INSIST ON AN EVALUATION OF HER IF SHE IS TRYING TO OBTAIN FULL CUSTODY. A SIMILAR THING HAPPENED TO ME EXCEPT SHE FALSLY ACCUSED ME OF ABUSE WHILE WE WHERE MARRIED AND "I" WAS THE ONE WANTING TO BE RECONSILED. i WAS FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO GET A GOOD COURT APPOINTED PYCHOLOGIST. AFTER REVIEWING ALL OF THE MATERIAL PRESENTED, HE RECOMMEDED THAT "I" GET SOLE CUSTODY OF OUR THREE CHILDREN, AGES 4,6 & 8. STAY ABOVE REPROACH AND KEEP GOOD RECORDS. GOOG LUCK

-- Anonymous, December 26, 2002