This is a serious question to which I would plead for as much input as possible. I read in the word that God has many conditions, if you be my people, I will be your God, if you remain faithful, I will save you, if you repent, I will forgive your sins. So I ask, is there unconditional love.

My wife would never have loved me if I were not a christian. Is that conditional?

One might also define love. Is it caring and concern, or is there more to it? A case can be made that God unconditionally loves us by caring deeply, and he longs for us, but doesn't end there? Think about this, God loved the world in such a way that he gave his only son, but again there is a condition, to believe on him?

Please give me your thoughts.

-- Anonymous, October 08, 2002

Answers

It appears to me that love and mercy are being crossed here. I'll use your last example to make my point and see what you think from there:

"Think about this, God loved the world in such a way that he gave his only son, but again there is a condition, to believe on him?"

The condition you state of belief here does not apply to God's love, per say, but rather to His mercy. God still loves those who do not believe, but He will not extend His mercy to them. Make sense?

Scott

-- Anonymous, October 08, 2002

Scott, you make good sense. I thank you for your response. I would like more input. This issue is important to me for dealing with some people. I am leaning to the fact that God's love IS unconditional as John writes: God is love. But how does that relate to us. Our world is filled with so much strife, is our love to be unconditional. And what if people really do love but there are conditions? How do we deal with them. I have found much conditional love. Is it possible for a human to love with no conditions?

-- Anonymous, October 20, 2002

Hey Bill,

I've been pondering this question for a while and was wondering if there was more background to the situation that could be provided as to the people you've been talking with. What was life like for them growing up- family situation, etc.? Is this still worth discussing or has too much time gone by now?

I ask these things because of the youth we have been working with and the struggle it has been to get them to see that God loves them regardless. Let me share about Darryl with you.

Darryl recently turned 18. He ran away from DFS 2-4 years ago and was finally emancipated. He met his father for the first time in 10 years last summer when his father was released from prison. His mother is now starting a 10 year sentence for drug charges. Darryl came to Christ last year before moving to another neighborhood, thought I'd never see him again. Last July, he called me to get together so I could guide him back onto the "straight and narrow." He was doing really well until 3 days before he turned 18. Went out with the wrong friend who tried to collect a debt and now they're both up on robbery charges. We won't go into all the misjustices the police committed in the handling of the case (and we wonder why black people blame the police when a bonafide drug dealer is killed in a shootout they started). To make a long story shorter, we helped Darryl contact family members to get him bailed out and allowed him to live with us for a time. The problem was, he'd get with friends and forget that we were expecting him home before 10 PM. Some nights he would never show. We finally had to ask him to stay with someone else while we worked to get him into a job training program.

Earlier in the day, we had promised to take him to get some decent clothes for the program. So after church on the promised day, we sought him out when he didn't show. Why? Because we know God loves him. Because we know too many people had broken promises to him. Because he needed to know God's grace and forgiveness is always there.

Darryl's days still go up and down. Tomorrow (Monday), he goes to court again, I believe to enter his plea. I have reminded him for the last three weeks that he needed to contact his public defender to discuss the facts of the case. A little over a week ago, I ran into a defense lawyer (Christian) who was willing to take his case pro bono if Darryl called him. I gave Darryl all the numbers he needed last weekend and gave him my cell number if there were any problems. I returned from the convention today and first thing I did was to call Darryl and check on how things had gone. He never called anyone because he forgot where he put the numbers. He has my cell memorized, yet never called. So tomorrow we go to court. Because he didn't follow through, he'll probably have a little more time to serve. And when he falls, we'll be there. Why? Because God loves him and he needs to see that love lived out through us.

Enough about that now. A thought to consider if your people had good home lives. Did their parents give them everything they wanted for nothing in return? Probably not. I know I had to earn my allowance by doing my chores. If my allowance was withheld for failure to complete chores should I assume my parents no longer love me? No, they are disciplining me so that I will learn. And God, being infinitely better than any of our parents, how much more does He love us than they? God bless, Scott

-- Anonymous, November 18, 2002

Scott I personally know what you are talking about when dealing with people who did not have a good father figure or mother figure.I had a dad who in the early 60's would whip me with a real bull whip,I saw him shoot my sisters dog with a high powerd rifle and then beat her because she cried.He also tied my mother to a chair and poured gasoline on her and threatend to light it. My mother would hit me with her fists and tell us we were losers and quiters and would not amount to anything.Even after I was grown up and had a family of my own she told me "i am disapointed in you because you did not turn out anything like I hoped".At the time she said this I was serving the Lord and running a timber business.It is hard to understand at times because she has went to church all her life and claims to be a christian. I am thank full that one Jan. day in 1977 Jesus called on me and showed me what true love is all about.I often think of the words to a song I sing called "I'm a prisoner of love a slave to the master" in it it said "neither fear nor persuasion could draw me to Christ but his Love has captured my soul" when we realize his Love for us we can then Love the unloveable.Just a couple of months ago I got to help baptize my dad,the one who had been so mean to me.The strange thing is my mom and him got divorced when I was 7 and she had a court order so he could not see me and I would sneak off to see him even though he had been so mean. Also I wanted to tell every one.One Sun. morning I asked a teen Sunday school class "what does it say to you when you see the adults you look up to in the Church not doing what they teach?" They all said the same thing "it means it's not real because if they believed it they would do what they teach".I have thought on that a lot .What example am I setting for my children? I know the example my mother set was not a very good one and she claims to be a christian.Still she puts down the poor in our community calls them trash and other names.One family was very poor but very good Christians and she always put them down because they did not live in a nice home or dress in nice clothes.This man and woman had been married 43 years and not on day did they live alone they always had some one living with them,some one who had lost their job,or some one who's house had burned or another poor family that needed a place to stay.I remember one night at Church the woman told "this is the first night in 43 years we have not had some one stay with us".I know that even though my mom put these people down, if she needed a place to stay they would have welcomed her.I still pray that the Lord one day will soften my mom's heart and then she to can realize what Jesus's love is all about.His Love is truly without condition for "while we were yet sinners he died for us" Chuck Williams

-- Anonymous, November 19, 2002