This past weekend, our beloved Alpine doe, Nellie Belle passed on. She was very old and had had a hard winter already. She had been showing no signs of illness and the others aren't either, so we're sure it was her age. This has upset us soooo much that we are going to take a sabatical from goat raising and sell off all of the other goats. They are mixed breeds. We'd always planned on selling all of them when Nellie Belle passed, but we expected she would at least last one more year. She surprised us, but we are determined to stick with our plan. We had also planned on starting a registered herd of Alpines shortly after her demise, but this is just too hard. I'm having a really hard time dealing with her death. I know this pain will pass, so hopefully by next spring we can get back into the game and get some does. I hope this doesn't sound too sappy, but she was so special to us. We have a pet cemetery at the back of our property that we took her to and brought back a large rock from that place to grace our gardens as a reminder of her. We've named the rock "Capra Nellie". Silly, I know, but the bloomin' rock even looks like her. I've lost pets before and chickens, but never have I been affected by an animal like this. My daughter sent me a card that said all pets go to heaven and I'm counting on that. Maybe Nellie Belle will be the matriarch up there like she was down here. All the other goats are simply lost without her. She set the routine for them all.

Well, I hope I haven't depressed all of you or made you think I'm a total idiot. I just thought someone here might understand how I feel. Thanks for letting me rant on.

Iris

-- Iris (WatchingWideEyed@peaceful.com), January 10, 2002

Answers

Thanks for sharing Iris. I know what it is like to lose and old girl and it sure isn't easy. When you see them at least twice a day for so many years you really get bonded don't you? I have an old girl out in my barn right now that is bred when I didn't want her to be, and I am really worried about her kidding. She opened the bucks gate to get in to him. It was really stupid of me not to think of how she can open anything that isn't a snap hook. He was all in behind link fence with electric so he couldn't even jump on it and she just walked over there and opened the gate and let herself in.

I hope that during your "sabbatical" from goats you will find some peace and be able to go back into it as you have planned. Life is pretty empty without them. I tryed about 4 years ago and just couldn't make it. This old girl that is out in my barn wouldn't eat at my friends house and half died until my friend said I just had to come and get her. I was SO HAPPY to get her back. I wanted to ask for her back but didn't want to go back on giving her to them. hugs

-- diane (gardiacaprines@yahoo.com), January 10, 2002.

Iris I am so sorry about your Nellie Belle. I love my goats so much that I understand your pain. My sweet Shasta was due yesterday and I've had the monitor on all night and I just got back from the barn to check on her(4am). I am very thankful that I'm the kind of person that cares and grieves over my animals. Cure for cold heart "get a goat" Again I'm so sorry about your dear Nellie Belle.

-- sherry (chickadee259@yahoo.com), January 11, 2002.

Iris, I just lost my goat which, I had not had that long but I can tell you I was attached to her and sure do miss her. I know what you're going through and no you are not being "sappy" she was your special goat and you have a right to be upset by her passing. George

-- george (bngcrview@aol.com), January 11, 2002.

I think you have to hold on to the notion that your goat lived a long and happy life. What is most upsetting is losing animals to illness or tragic endings at a young age. But they are only "on loan" to us as gifts for a certain amoount of time. Just remember what Nellie gave you - all the pleasure and delight and companionship. You were very lucky to have her as a friend all those years. The pain can be so intense, even physically so. But it DOES get better and I'm betting you'll be back in the game, starting up that alpine herd before long. Please don't act in haste in selling off your goats when you're still in mourning. Do you really want to miss out on all that joy your Nellie Belle - and all the goats waiting to make new memories with you and your family - gave to you?

-- Lynn (moonspinner@bluefrognet.net), January 13, 2002.

Hi, I agree with Lynn and would second everything she said. I know how special goats can be, I sure love mine more than any dog I've ever had, and nobody would think it was sappy to cry if your dog died. Nellie was your friend, of course you miss her! I do think it is beautiful that she went the way she did, peacefully, without any long suffering and hard decisions made to put her out of her pain. I can say that if you are anything like me, there will never be another Nellie. In my case it was Lily, I loved that doe so much, she was so sweet! There has never been another Lily, even after a couple hundred other goats. I tried to name a few of them Lily, it didn't work, it only devalued the name.

I do have a Sprite now, and she is just as special in her own, unique way. I don't think I would ever sell Sprite, I would put her down first, rather than possibly subject her to a life where she might be abused or end up in a sale barn. She is ugly and small and nobody else sees her like I do, but I sure love her! I know that I will cry when she goes, but I hope I'll be able to hang in there until the next special one comes along- and I hope the same for you.

-- Rebekah (daniel1@itss.net), January 14, 2002.