In a time like this, flags have limited availability. Is it patriotic to steal flags off other people's cars and put them on your own car? What about stealing flags and combining them with your own flags to maximize your flag waving ability?

-- Nude Spock (spockcock@yahoo.com), September 20, 2001

Answers

How about completely covering your car in flags like a flocked, flaggy stuffed animal. or something.

-- Samantha (glowgurl79@yahoo.com), September 20, 2001.

Today on the highway I passed a truck festooned with three American flags and a LEGO flag. I was perplexed.

-- Dan Perry (djperry@post.harvard.edu), September 20, 2001.

Stealing other people's flags = recycling. You're saving the environment! Go!

-- David Raposa (daver@popshots.org), September 20, 2001.

"The more flags the better," I always say. As far as I know, Legos are all American, though Lincoln Logs are more purely American from a historical perspective. And if they're not, who cares? I see people with Italian flags and American flags, Greek and American flags. Apparently, your second flag does not matter, so long as the other flag is American.

-- Nude Spock (spockcock@yahoo.com), September 20, 2001.

DUDE. DUDE. Just this past weekend I witnessed not one but TWO flag thefts, one off someone's roof and another FROM A FUCKING CHURCH FLAGPOLE! It was insane.

-- Ally (garance80@yahoo.com), September 20, 2001.

Holy shit, so I'm not the first. I better act now before everyone catches on.

-- Nude Spock (spockcock@yahoo.com), September 20, 2001.

I'm more impressed by people who steal the flagpole but leave the flag levitating

-- dave q (scrape100@hotmail.com), September 20, 2001.

Lego = danish
also, americans calling them 'legos' = dud. the plural of 'lego' is 'lego'

-- m jemmeson (michael@jemmeson.freeserve.co.uk), September 21, 2001.

Back during the Viet Nam war we burned up almost all the flags, along with our draft cards. But we liked the colors and the stars and stripes and stuff so much, too. They were just cool, in the artsy-fartsy sense, so we painted them on EVERYTHING, especially Volkswagons and Volkswagon vans. So, Samantha...go for it!

-- Zzzzz (asleep@the.wheel), September 21, 2001.

How can the plural of legos be "lego"? That doesn't make sense.

-- Ally (garance80@yahoo.com), September 24, 2001.

--> "Lego = danish"

Erector Set = crumpet Blox = fritter Lincoln Log = strudel

--> "also, americans calling them 'legos' = dud. the plural of 'lego' is 'lego'"

The plural of "logo" is "logos," unless we're speaking philisophically, in which case there is no singular.

This one time, I spent a couple hours in the Mall of America Lego Land arena, kicking kids off the coolest platforms and making race cars ---- Zzzzzoooooooom!

The moral of this story is that, while I enjoy fruit-filled snacks, Danes ain't so great.

-- Mub (Trickknee@hotmail.com), September 26, 2001.

I tell you what, you better stay outta my yard. I'll bust out the can of whup but on ya. My flags are MINE. You should have had one anyhow. Unpatriotic whimp, no doubt you will steal it at night too?

COWARD

-- place (USA@is.agreat), September 26, 2001.

actually i made a mistake. the problem is actually that a single piece of lego is not 'a lego'. 'Lego' refers to the whole system, therefore no plural.

-- m jemmeson (mjemmeson@hotmail.com), September 29, 2001.

What are flags but country napkins?

-- Mike Hanle y (pennysong@japan.com), October 02, 2001.

Yeah, there are no such thing as 'legos'.

-- KillerCrud (killercrud@hotmail.com), October 02, 2001.

Singular: Lego block

Plural: Lego Blocks

- or "Legos" if you want to cut down on syllables and not sound like a pedantic nerd. (I guess "pedantic" is pretty nerdly too.)

-- Dave225 (adspace@altavista.com), October 03, 2001.

WE HAVE BEEN PATROLLING THE NEIGHBORHOOD EVERY NIGHT SINCE 9/11 AND ANY VEHICLE NOT DISPLAYING THE BELOVED FLAG GETS A 2' KEYSCRATCH ON THE FIRST OFFENSE, DENTED UP A BIT ON THE 2ND, BROKEN WINDOWS ON THE 3RD OFFENSE. MOST OF THE NEIGHBORHOOD IS IN COMPLIANCE BUT WE STILL HAVE A FEW STILL GIVING US TROUBLE.

-- SGT GOLDEAGLE (USA1@AOL.COM), October 04, 2001.

for the love of God say your not serious

Santa

-- Santa (dontcare@aboutmail.com), October 09, 2001.

i think its sick and pathetic to be waving flags around now, where were all these flags on September 10th, where were they all in March. Why is it that no one showed there patrioticness and love for America until part of it was blown up. It makes me sick to see people driving around with american flags now, if you supported america why didnt you show it before the 11th?

I saw an advertisement on TV for a durable weather resistant flag that came with a handy plastic clip in order to display it from the window, American pride is a marketing scam now? What the government can di is whenever American Pride is low they can fly a PLANE into one of our buildings and people will love america.

I dont have to punch my family memeber before i love them, why do we have to wait till America is smacked before anyone cares about it?

Santa

-- Santa (dontcare@aboutmail.com), October 09, 2001.

Santa! What are you doing in here?

*Nervously looks around*

-- KillerCrud (killercrud@hotmail.com), October 11, 2001.

One of the little plastic American flags at my work says "made in China" near the stick part. I find that hilarious.

-- yo muthuh (optimus_prime8@hotmail.com), October 11, 2001.

What are you guys talking about? The whole fucking America is one big commercial! Just drive around and look at the signs. Even religion markets Jesus. Stupid ass people buying those "what would jesus do" (wwjd) t- shirts. Here's a marketing idea... Why doesn't anyone sell Satan t-shirts? What would Satan do? Oh yeah, try watching a little t.v. without getting sick. All those stupid reality shows. A bunch of wimps in the rough - those same people couldn't survive a real life jungle situation. Even a serial killer isn't safe from commercialism - remember those serial killer trading cards? Sick fucks!

So I say, if you want to show your patriotism - buy a fucking flag. Or steal a shitload of them and sell it yourself to the suckers who succumb to American commercialism.

-- (american@built.com), October 13, 2001.