CIRCLE FLIES

A farmer got pulled over by a state trooper for speeding, and the trooper started to lecture the farmer about his speed, and in general began to throw his weight around to try to make the farmer uncomfortable.

Finally, the trooper got around to writing out the ticket, and as he was doing that he kept swatting at some flies that were buzzing around his head.

The farmer said, "Having some problems with circle flies there, are ya?" The trooper stopped writing the ticket and said - "Well yeah, if that's what they are, I never heard of circle flies".

So the farmer says- "Well, circle flies are common on farms. See, they're called circle flies because they're almost always found circling around the back end of a horse."

The trooper says, "Oh," and goes back to writing the ticket. Then after a minute he stops and says, " Hey---wait a minute, are you trying to call me a horses ass?"

The farmer says, "Oh no, officer. I have too much respect for law enforcement and police officers to even think about calling you a horses ass." The Trooper says, "Well, that's a good thing," and goes back to writing the ticket.

After a long pause, the farmer says, "Hard to fool them flies though."

So,wildman,now you know why there are flies.Any other existential questions we can answer for you? :oD

-- Anonymous, May 23, 2001

Answers

Sharoan, I can't tell you how much I hate it when someone steals my thunder! When I showed your other post to my wife, she read the first part about why flies exist and said, "there's your answer". Now, I was going to ask you if I had just been insulted by my wife, something that has never happened before, or if I misunderstood her. Hum, I guess you answered that question before I asked it, didn't you? Think more frequent showers would help? Incidently, we did get some citronella oil, applied it to cotton balls and used pins to put them on the screen door. There seemed to be less flies even though it was threatening to rain. Of course, I was in the field raking hay so maybe THAT IS the answer! Even if it works, I still don't think it's citronella oil! And even if it is, I still ain't gonna admit it! Thanks for answering unasked questions.

Wildman

-- Anonymous, May 23, 2001

jd..er...Wildman...er..whomever - you're welcome.

Your wife is right.She is always right.You know that.Or have you forgotten that,as well? Oh,my,this is a serious case.

Annie and Earthmamma know herbs that can help with this male mental pause problem. Don't be afraid to ask for help.We're here for you. (we're the touchy feely bunch,after all.)

Have you Bought a full dressed Hog,grown a beard,and slapped on a leather jacket with a confederate flag sewn on the back? You have? Oh no,it's worse than I thought.I hear you,brother.I feel your pain.We can help.Just let it all out.You'll feel better.

Spill them beans,so we can all get a good laugh!We obviously have nothing better to do. :o)

-- Anonymous, May 24, 2001