The Origin Of Chapstick

An old cowhand came riding into town on a hot, dry, dusty day. The local sheriff watched from his chair in front of the saloon as the cowboy wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail a few feet in front of the sheriff.

"Howdy, Stranger." "Howdy, Sheriff."

The cowboy then moved slowly to the back of the horse, lifted his tail and placed a big kiss where the sun don't shine. He dropped the horse's tail, stepped up on the walk, and aimed towards the swing doors of the saloon.

"Hold on there, Mister," said the Sheriff. "Did I just see what I think I saw?"

"Reckon you did, Sheriff. I got me some powerful chapped lips."

"And does that cure them?" the Sheriff asked.

"Nope, but it keeps me from lickin''em."

-- sara (tshoos@peoplepc.com), March 15, 2001

Answers

You see a pickup with three cowboys in it. Which is the smarter cowboy?

The one in the middle. He doesn't have to drive or get out to open and close gates.

-- Ken S. in WC TN (scharabo@aol.com), March 15, 2001.

A cowboy walks into a bar and sits next to a young lady. They get chatting and she asks him what he does. He replies that he is a cowboy, he spends his life on the range making sure the cows don't get into trouble. He asks what she does. She replies that she is a lesbian. Not being too smart, the cowboy asks her to clarify. Well, she says, I wake up thinking about women, dream of women all day, and go to bed thinking about women. The next day the cowboy returns to the bar, sits next to a different young lady, and gets chatting. She asks him what he does. Well, he says, I used to be a cowboy, but now I think I'm a lesbian.

-- David C (fleece@eritter.net), March 16, 2001.