One day a farmer brought a young, healthy, robust rooster to his farm to service his large flock of hens. Upon the young rooster's arrival, he was greeted by the old rooster. "I'm here to take over this flock of hens", announced the youngster, "so I believe it's time for you to scram." The old rooster took this in stride, and said to the youngster "Now, now, lad...let's be sportin' about this. I've been here for many years, and there's plenty of hens on this farm, how 'bout you just let me have those five old hens out back?" The arrogant young rooster promptly informed the old timer that he was younger and stronger, and he was quite capable of looking after ALL the hens. The old timer then said, "Tell ya what. How 'bout we have a little contest? You and me have a race. If you win, you can have all the hens, I won't say anymore about it. If I win, you let me have those five old hens to hang around with." The youngster looked at the old timer and thought, what the heck, I can beat this old guy with ease. "Okay. What you got in mind?" The old rooster said "Here's the plan. We meet here at the barn in the early evening. We start at the door, go down around the horse pasture, back up around the pigpens, and across the yard in front of the farmhouse, finish line is the driveway." So, the day passed, and in the early evening the two roosters met at the door of the barn, many of the other farm animals gathered around to watch the match. The old goat bleated the start signal, and they were off! The old rooster shot out in lead, down around the horse pasture, the young rooster keeping an easy stride a few paces behind. Hens cackled and sheep bleated. Around the pigpens they flew, feathers rustling with their stride, the pigs squealing their encouragement. Up across the meadow to the front yard, the hens squawking excitedly, the cows starting to moo. All this time the young rooster had held back. But now as they approached the front yard, the young rooster kicked it into gear, and within a few strides the 2 roosters were racing full throttle across the front yard, right in front of the farmhouse porch. The old farmer who had settled into his rocking chair to enjoy a quiet evening, heard all the commotion, and sat up, just as the 2 roosters were starting across the yard, with the young rooster closing the gap. Just as the young rooster reached the tail end of the older, the farmer jumped up, grabbed his shotgun, and BOOM! shot the young rooster. "DAMN!!" swore the farmer. "That's gotta be the 3rd wierd rooster I've bought this week!"

-- Chelsea (rmbehr@istar.ca), March 07, 2001