1. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight-savings time.

2. The most powerful force in the universe is gossip.

3. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above- average drivers.

4. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

5. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

6. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

7. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

8. The main accomplishment of almost all organized protests is to annoy people who are not in them.

9. If a God who created the entire universe with all of its glories decides to deliver a message to humanity, He WILL NOT use, as His messenger, a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle.

10. You should not confuse your career with your life.

11. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.

12. No matter what happens, somebody will take it way too seriously.

13. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.

14. Your friends love you, anyway.

15. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance!

-- Anonymous, January 05, 2001

Answers

13. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.

LMAO at that one....how true.

Thanks Pat for the TGIF humor.

-- Anonymous, January 05, 2001

Top 25 Children's Book You Never See

1. You Were an Accident

2. Strangers Have the Best Candy

3. The Little Sissy Who Snitched

4. Some Kittens Can Fly 5. Where Would You Like to Be Buried?

6. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her

7. All Dogs Go to Hell 8. When Mommy and Daddy Don't Know the Answer They Say God Did It 9. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia

10. What Is That Dog Doing to That Other Dog?

11. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?

12. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry 13. You Are Different and That's Bad

14. Pop Goes The Hamster....And Other Great Microwave Games 15. The Hardy Boys, the Barbie Twins, and the Vice Squad

16. The Tickling Babysitter

17. Babar Meets the Taxidermist

18. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence

19. The Boy Who Died from Eating All His Vegetables

20. Start a Real-Estate Empire With the Change From Your Mommy's Purse

21. The Pop-up Book of Human Anatomy

22. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will

23. The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and are Shot Dead

24. How to Become The Dominant Military Power In Your Elementary School

25. Controlling the Playground: Respect through Fear

-- Anonymous, January 05, 2001

Good stuff Trish.

#5 worries me. It didn't used to.

Thanks.

-- Anonymous, January 06, 2001

Same here, Carlos. As if that's not bad enough, it seems I've *become* #13.

-- Anonymous, January 06, 2001

And um, well I've always wanted to be #15, can I? Please.?

-- Anonymous, January 06, 2001