Do you like weddings? Have you ever been in one? What are your views on marriage?

-- Anonymous, December 22, 2000

Answers

i like weddings..kinda. depends on who's getting married and why. (hint: who wants to marry a millionaire - i do i do! wait you mean we have to consumate the thing? fudge dat!). i was in one of my brother's wedding. hurrah to the fact amy chose dresses that i looked good in, sucks to the fact in was the fucking backwoods of tennessee and i got called all sorts of names because my family is catholic. i did a reading at my other married brother's wedding, i was pissed i wasn't actually in the wedding party though. i think marriage is great if you're willing to commit to it and work on it. otherwise, don't bother cause you're gonna screw yourself and whoever you loved at the time of marriage over hardcore. and thats all i have to say about that. murry christmas everybody.

-- Anonymous, December 22, 2000

Weddings: I've only ever been to one, my cousin's, which I was in (as a bridesmaid). It took a heck of a lot of planning (as did that of a woman at work who married - she spent more time organising it than doing anything productive) and given the amount of time it lasted and for the amount it meant (she was living with the groom anyway), it seemed very expensive and pointless to me. After that, I vowed that if I ever did marry (I'm not opposed to the idea, although cohabiting would suit me fine, just NO KIDS), I'd do it in a registry office.

However, lately, I've thought it would be cool to have a non- traditional wedding, where the style was better suited to my persona. i.e. no evil dresses and suits of death, I'm thinking leather. Rock versions of the traditional music. I don't suppose many of my relatives would approve, but on your "special day", you should be able to have things how you want them, rather than sticking to odd traditions, right?

-- Anonymous, December 22, 2000

Benefits of marriage: legal privileges. Like right to insurance, right to see a spouse when they are in ICU, right to inheritance, etc.

That's about it. I'm not a fan of marriage, I enjoy the committment, but it's possible to have the committment without the ceremony or paper.

As for weddings, eh. Fun? I guess. You get cake.

-- Anonymous, December 22, 2000

Mmmmmmm, cake. I want some... Eric, will you marry me?

-- Anonymous, December 23, 2000

"Forgiveness is the second best thing about Christmas. You know what the best thing is? Cake." - Norm McDonald

-- Anonymous, December 23, 2000

Not only do I absofuckinlutely loathe xmas, I think weddings are just about as annoying. All this white and cake and happiness and shit - all things I dislike with a passion - it's naseuating (sp) really. Marriage is probably the single worst thing possible. The commitment isn't a problem, but the fact that the person is going to eventually annoy the hell out me anyway, because that's what people do.

-- Anonymous, December 23, 2000

Personally, I think that rape or FGM is the single worst thing possible, but hey, that's just me.

-- Anonymous, December 25, 2000

Or, murder. That's pretty bad too.

-- Anonymous, December 25, 2000

Y'know, genocide isn't such a big happy fun ball.

Denise, I respect that you don't like marriage or what it stands for or the ceremony.. but isn't part of being an adult respecting other peoples' choices? Like instead of saying how awful marriage is in general, just say it's awful for you, not what you'd choose, and state why you feel that way. Trust me, it's easier that way. Much.

I've been to four weddings that I can think of off the top of my head, and I was only in three (my grandfather's, my father's and my mother's, weird, I know.) I'm not really against weddings, because none of them were big white wedding church fiascos, but simple pretty ceremonies or whatever.

I can't imagine my own wedding tho. Geez, that hurts to think about. Ew. I can't imagine being married right now. WEIRD, I tell you.

-- Anonymous, December 25, 2000

I'm leaving to go to a wedding tomorrow. I'm not very excited. For a person who doesn't like weddings, I sure think about my own a lot.

-- Anonymous, December 26, 2000

I was never planning on getting married. My parents married and divorced each other 3 times, so marriage meant very little to me. My ideal relationship was to live next door to my lover. I decided that I didn't want to clean up someone else's shit: literally and figuratively. Then something happened. I met 'the one' and ended up married at 19! I never planned on getting married. I certainly never dreamt about it. I got married 3 months after becoming engaged because I didn't want to have the chance to romanticize the whole thing. I think people often build up marriage to be about something its not. I think two people can have a great, monogamous, committed relationship without the paper, and people can have an awful, trustless relationship while being married. Something just told me 'marry this guy', so I did. It was the right thing for me. I love being married, but it's because I'm married to someone who also loves being married...and being married to me. People do things different ways, which is great. As long as they are happy and making the person they love happy at the same time.

-- Anonymous, December 27, 2000

oh, and weddings make me cry (which I hate..I'm overly sensitive) and I love receptions....I love dancing, so that's fun!

-- Anonymous, December 27, 2000

Aaaah, marriage. While the people geeting married enjoy it, unless i'm actually related i find them boring. The last one i went to was in a court yard, where everyone stood. Glad it didn't rain and the ceremony was short.

Anyone been to a wedding in a weird place?

-- Anonymous, December 29, 2000

I got married in May (06th, to be exact) and it was MY wedding. That's the difference between good weddings and bad weddings, by the way. I did it my way, didn't invite most of my family (for which they're still not speaking to me)didn't get married in a church (which caused some family members to meanly inform me that I'm not "really" married - well whoopdedoo..) and wore a navy blue dress which I have since worn on several job interviews.. I carried a HUGE bunch of daisies, my flower girls danced and sang throughout the entire wedding (much to the dismay of the JP) and we didn't have a honeymoon (we bought a house instead) .. I hope our marriage will be the same. :)

-- Anonymous, December 30, 2000