Thiis joke was sent to me from a Goat E-Mail list that I belong to. Thought you all might enjoy this. The Consultant- A shepherd was herding his flocks in a remote pasture when suddenly a new Jeep Grand Cherokee flashes out of a dust cloud toward him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses, and a YSL tie leaned out of the window and asks our shepherd: "If I can tell you exactly how many goats you have in your flock, will you give me one'?" The shepherd looks at the yuppie, then at his peacefully grazing flock and calmly answers, "Why not?" The yuppie parks the car, whips out his notebook, connects it to a cell phone, surfs to a NASA page on the Internet where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system, scans the area, and opens up a database and some 60 Excel spreadsheets, with complex formulas. Finally, he prints out a 150 page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized printer, turns round to our shepherd, and says: "You have exactly 1,586 goats!" "That's correct. As agreed, you can take one of the goats," says the shepherd. The shepherd watches, as the yuppie makes a selection and bundles it into his Grand Cherokee. Then, the shepherd says to the yuppie, "If I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me my goat back?" "Why not?" answers the smart young man. "You are a consultant," says the shepherd. "That's correct," says the yuppie, "But how did you guess that?" "It was easy. You turn up here, although nobody called you. You want to be paid for the answer to a question, to which I already knew the solution. And you don't know sh - - about my business, because you took my dog.

-- Mark (deadgoatman@webtv.net), October 29, 2000

Answers

Ahhhhhhh I'm having a blonde moment here... (I am blonde so no offense to anyone... I'm just slow at times and joke about it:) I don't get it, will have to re read this one. LOL:)

-- Bernice (geminigoats@yahoo.com), October 29, 2000.

Bernice, he took the guys dog thinking it was a goat! LOL Vicki

-- Vicki McGaugh TX (vickilonesomedoe@hotmail.com), October 29, 2000.

Thanks, Mark!! The last time I heard that joke it was about sheep! And the guy was a lawyer who took the dog.

A cyber pal in virtual blondeness,

-- sheepish (rborgo@gte.net), October 29, 2000.

LOL !!! Ok, I'm blonde too, but I got the joke right away!!! Tee- hee!!! Annie in SE OH.

-- Annie Miller (annie@1st.net), October 29, 2000.

Got a real chuckle out of this! Worked with the USDA for a few years and they were really good at consultants, always restructuring the agency. This joke really tells it how I felt about consultants. We always said if you owned a briefcase and lived more that 50 miles away you could be a consultant. All you folks have a good day!

-- (betsyk@pathwaynet.com), October 30, 2000.

My thinking is if he was a true consultant he was going to start a dairy with his new goat. Might have been interesting watching the first milking. gail

-- gail missouri ozarks (gef123@hotmail.com), October 30, 2000.