On their 20th wedding anniversary the wife noticed small tears in the corners of her husbands eyes. She commented she had never seen him get emotional before. The husband said, "Remember when your Dad caught us in the hay loft and said if I didn't marry you I'd go to prison for twenty years? When the wife said sure she remember that. Husband then said, "Well, I'd be getting out tomorrow."

-- Ken S. (scharabo@aol.com), August 07, 2000

Answers

Good one , Ken. I printed it out for my wife (building my case for an insanity plea)

-- Jay Blair (jayblair678@yahoo.com), August 07, 2000.

Ken, Here is another good one I Liked also. When I came home from the barbara shop one day and came into the house my wife asked me what I was smiling about, I told her I saw a for sale sign on the bulletin board that read Encypodeia set for sale very cheap dont need it wife knows everything (no offense to the ladies on this board.They give very good answers on this forum. Joe

-- Mary Welshko (marwel@microserve.net), August 07, 2000.

You men!Such jokes!lol.When my husband seems to be getting slightly exasperated at me,I like to sweetly tell him:"Yes honey,it's true. If a man spoke alone and in the middle of a forest,He'd still be wrong."[bad-I know.] God bless,~~~Tracy~~~

-- Tracy Jo Neff (tntneff@ifriendly.com), August 07, 2000.

I can't resist!! Here's another one. POTATO TRAGEDY > > >> > > >> You know that all potatoes have eyes. Well, Mr. and Mrs. Potato had eyes for each other and they finally got married and had a little one, a real sweet potato, whom they called " Yam " They wanted the best for little Yam, telling her all about the facts of life. They warned her about going out and getting half baked because she could get Mashed, get a bad name like 'Hot Potato,' and then end up with a bunch of Tater Tots. She said not to worry, "No Mr. McSpud would get her in the sack and make a Rotten Potato out of her!" But she wouldn't stay home and become a Couch Potato either. She would get plenty of food and exercise so as not to be skinny like her Shoestring cousins. Mr. and Mrs. Potato even told her about going off to Europe and to watch out for the Hard Boiled guys from Ireland. And even the greasy guys from France called the French Fries. They also said she should watch out for the Indians when going out west because she could get Scalloped. She told them she would stay on the straight and narrow and wouldn't associate with those high class Blue Belles or the ones from the other side of the tracks who advertise their trade on all the trucks you see around town that say, 'Frito Lay.' Mr. & Mrs. Potato wanted the best for Yam, so they sent her to Idaho P.U., that's Potato University, where the Big Potatoes come from. When she graduates, she'll really be in the Chips. But one day she came home and said she was going to marry Tom Brokaw. Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset and said she couldn't marry him > > >because > > >> he's just a.... > > >> > > >> Are you ready for this? > > >> > > >> > > >> > > >> Are you sure? > > >> > > >> OK! Here it is! Remember I warned you! > > >> > > >> > > >> > > >> COMMON TATER!!!!

-- Jeanette Springer (jeni@dwave.net), August 07, 2000.

These are nice jokes;I think I may wait till you get a little more and print them up myself!I've spent so much time debating lately!It's refreshing to lighten-up. ~Tracy~ ps-my earlier response was not a joke-just a joking rebuke of "you men".~God Bless...

-- Tracy Jo Neff (tntneff@ifriendly.com), August 07, 2000.

Here's one for the ladies: This couple who were 60 years old were celebrating 30 years of wedded bliss. A good fairy wanted to reward them for their devotion so she said. I will give each of you a wish. The lady wanted to travel, the fairy said no problem, tapped her on the shoulder and she got 2 tickets for around the world. He thought a moment and then said I would like to be married to a woman 30 years younger than me. No probelem said the fairy tapping him on the shoulder, making him 90.

-- Barbara C. Fischer (cen12205@centurytel.net), August 15, 2000.

Before we were married, my husband said to me, "You know, I hate to admit it, but 98% of the time you're right, and the rest of the time you're only half wrong." How could I not marry him?!

-- snoozy (allen@oz.net), August 15, 2000.