Someone asked me to post this on my site, but it's down and a lot more people come here . . . this is what he wrote:

Just to explain sweetie, that bar job I was hoping to get..it seems to me that the owner wants me to be a little more than her employee, she hasn't outright said it, but she was being way overly flirtatious, and was saying all sorts of sexual innuendo stuff...She is older and definetly "not attractive", (and besides, she could be gorgeous, I am just not interested in getting involved with anyone else), I could just say that I changed my mind, and go to work somewhere else, but I am sure that this is the ideal type of job, it would pay cash, so no taxes, and would be flexible as far as working days......but if there is no way of working this thing out, I guess that I will have to look elsewhere. I already told her that I have a girlfreind in Ontario, when I first met her, but it does not seem to make any difference to the people out here... so if you could give me feedback that would be great, and if you could post this question that would be great too.

So the question is: How do you tell a prospective employer that their sexual advances are unwelcome without ruining the possiblility of getting the job?"

-- Anonymous, August 02, 2000

Answers

Sweetie, I hope you don't mind I added this here, Katie gets a lot more traffic to her site.

To be honest we were talking for along time the other night about leaving the airforce and to do what you want to do for the betterment of your life, and not to prove something. Now, in this case, the bar is an amazing job, the money is great and then you can send me a lot of gifts or just straight cash (you know I'm joking), but honestly, maybe she does this to everyone. Take the job, if she continues, then just ignore it. Everyone gets the hint if you flirt and you get the cold shoulder. It would turn me off right away if someone was uninterested. She could just be old and needing some . . . just do what you'd normally do, unless it's bothering you. Then you'll have to do what you feel is best.

I know you well enough to work in conditions you don't like, I mean you lived with Thirston for how long? You grew the "selective hearing"-thing.

I say take the job and see how long she pulls it off for.

Love you, miss you.

-- Anonymous, August 02, 2000