Stottie Cup Round 1

31 March 1998, Wimbledon away, 0-0. A game I looked forward to as a Southern-based Mag in them days. F*cking awful!!! Only shot by either side in 90 minutes was the last disgusted kick of the game by Stevie Watson. We had a killer time in the stands mind! Count those defenders and ask what we were hoping to achieve under that tukey.

Points Given 4 Peacock 2 Barton 1 (sub) Shearer 2 Speed 2 Pearce 2 Ketsbaia 2 Watson 2 Hamilton 2 Albert 2 Dabizas 2 Griffin 2 Gillespie 1 (sub)

BBS Corithian League Stottie Cup: Round 1

No.	Home Team	Result	No.	Away Team
1	Baxter Basics	2-1	32	Unaccountable Wild-elf Bottles
17	Bewildered De Builders	2-0	30	The Entertainers
2	Blaydon Racers	4-0	18	Ceptic
4	Chevy's Choppers	1-0	15	The Gallowgate
5	Corinthian Smart-Casuals	6-0	27	Shilbottle WMC
19	Doomed United	1-3	25	Real Seghill
20	Douglas All Boys (B) Team	0-0	28	SS Enterprise
21	FC Forget-Me-Nots	3-4	16	The Stellar Warriors
8	ITK Heaton World Beaters	0-0	3	Carlisle United Revisited
9	Jessie's High Pants	2-1	12	Real Zaragossy
10	Pete's Porkie Pies	2-1	23	Gallowgateaserai
24	Preston Big End	2-2	7	Howdon Harriers
11	Quantum Mechanicals	3-1	13	Screacher's Creatures
26	Sexy Boys	2-2	6	Dudley Boys
14	Spayne	1-0	29	Superstitious FC
31	Toon Gutter Snipes	2-2	22	FC Jumpers for Goal Posts

This leads to the following replays tomorrow:

BBS Corithian League Stottie Cup: Round 1 Replays

No.	Home Team	Result	No.	Away Team
28	SS Enterprise	Vs	20	Douglas All Boys (B) Team
3	Carlisle United Revisited	Vs	8	ITK Heaton World Beaters
7	Howdon Harriers	Vs	24	Preston Big End
6	Dudley Boys	Vs	26	Sexy Boys
22	FC Jumpers for Goal Posts	Vs	31	Toon Gutter Snipes

And the draw for Round 2 is:

BBS Corithian League Stottie Cup: Round 2

No.	Home Team	Result	No.	Away Team
1	Baxter Basics	Vs	3	Blaydon Racers
4	Chevy's Choppers	Vs	5	Corinthian Smart-Casuals
6	Real Seghill	Vs	2	Bewildered De Builders
9	ITK Heaton World Beaters or Carlisle United Revisited	Vs	16	Toon Gutter Snipes or FC Jumpers for Goal Posts
10	Jessie's High Pants	Vs	7	Douglas All Boys (B) Team or SS Enterprise
11	Pete's Porkie Pies	Vs	14	Sexy Boys or Dudley Boys
12	Preston Big End or Howdon Harriers	Vs	8	The Stellar Warriors
15	Spayne	Vs	13	Quantum Mechanicals

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Answers

So, Preston Big End weren't man enough to stop the Harriers at home; what chance do they stand at the Broon Bowl? A swift victory tomorrow should bring on another 'easy' home tie against The Stellar Warriors and then we're nearly home and dry. Now what was that thing that comes before a fall again...

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

I always reckon that cup matches are icing on the pond and can often distract you from the important matters. Our narrow defeat to Stella Warriors at Langley Park isn't important at all. Only one team can win a cup and it won't be FC Dementia Football Club this year. Are we disappointed? Of course we aren't. We are now free to contemplate on the league and will be focussed totally on that. But what disappoints me is the loss of the glamour ties for our fan and sponsors. Robbie's Incompetence Pants will have a stain on their involvement and we don't like that.

So you can rest assured that we will be back again as soon as the disappointment wears off. In the meanwhile, we will be off on a richly deserved Saga Holiday to Lyme Regis to regroup, review out tictacs and plan our assault on the BBS Corruptible League. Not forgetting Grab-a-Grannie night on Thursday. Whey-hey!

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Divven't fret Robby, it's only the League Cup...the BBSCLFA Cup is still to come!

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Ooh, me eyes! Please Softie, not the blue!

Now, I thought I'd picked an entertaining side, yet when NUFC score a hatful, I score nowt, and when NUFC are shite, I net 6! By my top-of-head reckoning, I got about 17 out of 24 there, and if that's enough for a 6-goal onion-bagfest, I must have some players virtually no-one else has. So do us a favour and tell us which ones they are, willya? Cos I never have the faintest inkling what I'm gonna score when I look at the points, and I want to get a feel for where I'm going right and (largely) wrong.

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Hmmm tough draw. We did manage a 1-1 draw at Baxters a couple of games ago though!

-- Anonymous, July 11, 2000

Well, the Big End are certainly up against it now Softie - but remember it's a game of two games (??).
More importantly, it aint over till the fat lass sings - and we're drafting Vanessa Feltz into the squad for the replay.

-- Anonymous, July 11, 2000

Stottie Cup Round 1 Replays

18 October 1997, Leeds at Elland Road, we lost 4-1. Ouch. Bit of a stuffing: we had managed to laugh off the loss to Wimbeldon but this was a first indication of just how bad that season was going to get. Gillespie got our consolation goal.

Points Given -1 (2 - Goal Dif) Watson 2 Peacock 2 Howey 2 Beresford 2 Barton 1 (booked) Batty 1 (booked) Lee 2 Ketsbaia 2 Tomasson 1 (sub - already!) Barnes 2 Gillespie 4 (sub and goal) Rush 2

BBS Corithian League Stottie Cup: Round 1 Replays

No.	Home Team	Result	No.	Away Team
28	SS Enterprise	0-4	20	Douglas All Boys (B) Team
3	Carlisle United Revisited	5-0	8	ITK Heaton World Beaters
7	Howdon Harriers	4-5	24	Preston Big End
6	Dudley Boys	0-1	26	Sexy Boys
22	FC Jumpers for Goal Posts	3-0	31	Toon Gutter Snipes

Some serious poundings handed out there...Dudley Boys achieving a creditable 0/22. I just hope for Preston Big End's sake that the cheque doesn't bounce ;-)

-- Anonymous, July 11, 2000

" ~~~~~~~ save ~~~ the ~~~ Queen ~~."

Phew!

-- Anonymous, July 11, 2000

She doesn't sweat too much for a fat lass :-)

-- Anonymous, July 11, 2000