Last night I was watching an ER rerun, and on came a commercial for some new movie called "The Kid" by Disney. The preview made me perk up though and NOT because of the movie.. the song in the background was "I Wish" by Stevie Wonder! Now, I adore Stevie, and well, so does Will Smith. I was so excited to hear the ACTUAL "I Wish" song in the background instead of "Wicky wicky wickity wa wa Wes".

And what's up with that dorky group called A Teens doing a ripoff of Abba's "Dancing Queen"? You can't mess with the classics, man. That's almost as bad as Madonna's ripoff of Don McLean's "American Pie". There's also a new song out with John Mellen Cougarcamp's "Jack & Diane" in the background, and some whiny Mariah Scarey wannabe singing over the top of it. Or maybe it really *is* Mariah Scarey.

What ripoffs piss *you* off?

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

Answers

Yes, the Jack and Diane rip off (Jessica Simpson, I believe) sucks major ass.

But nothing, and I will firmly stand by this, NOTHING, is as bad as that new song that samples "cause the boys in hood are always hard". I have been bitching about that fucking song for weeks. And no one even knows what I am talking about. No one remembers the original, and I don't even know exactly what the song was. I just know that it was some type of rap song and now it is some white boy sing sing la la song. It sucks. The first time I saw the video advertised on MTV and I saw these sad looking white boys singing it, I thought it was a joke, I thought it was a parody. I would find it very sad, it if didn't annoy me so.

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

That song, I think, is called "Boyz in the Hood" - originally done by Easy-E (who was unable for comment... something about worms and snails infesting his corpse) ... the song is basically about popping caps in those who "talk trash," beating up "da bitches," and "droppin' da 8-ball" - nice. Then Dynamite Hack decided to redo it, folksy-la-la style. I personally think it's hilarious... they're totally making fun of all that "bad-ass shit" that the NWA tried to put out.

My goodness, I used a lot of quotes.

Sorry about the Easy-E comment.. anyone who puts out a song called "Gimme Dat Nut" doesn't really rank high on my "People I Respect List."

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

At first, I liked Madonna's "American Pie". Once I saw the video, and her ass-crack, I just couldn't listen to it any more.

When people started redoing 80s songs, I just about died. "Break my Stride" was not meant to be re-done. It's a classic. To hear some idiots rapping to it was a little much.

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

i guess i shouldn't mention that kathie lee gifford's new album is ALL cover songs...

i read it in people mag. at the doctor's office. i don't support the bitch in any way.

i didn't even buy this great purse b/c her name was on it. suck on that, miss kathie!

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

irene....that is so not the news I needed on a friday afternoon.

re: Dynamite Hack, yeah, they only sing about date-rape, and that is so much more respectable. (unless date-rape is some new cool drink or drug or dance or something that I am way too out of the cool loop to know about)

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

I didn't say that I respected Dynamite Hack. I know nothing about Dynamite Hack except that their cover of "Boyz in the Hood" was pretty funny. Date-rape, as far as I know, isn't cool except to the a few hooking-up, Everclear-drinking, SUV-driving frat boys in the college circuit. ((Which is precisely why I stay in my room and study.))

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

Man, I love that Easy-E song. "want nothin in life, than to be legit, don't quote me on that boy, cuz I ain't said shit." I'm already dancing in my chair.

But see. I was a very naive 17 year old. Boys in the hood? I thought maybe they meant car mechanics.

I've learned a lot the last 11 years.

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

I don't know if this technically counts as a ripoff, but I hate hate HATE HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE hearing Beatles songs used in advertisements, particularly when it's a bad cover of a Beatles song. God damn you, Michael Jackson! God damn you to hell!

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

I think the Dynamite Hack "Boyz in the Hood" is funny as hell. It IS a parody. Have you seen the whole video? They're doing all this gangsta booty dance stuff a la current rap videos but wearing like preppy pastel clothes. Cracks me up. (I don't know about the rest of their stuff either.)

I think one of the greatest rip-off travesties currently is the fact that Britney Spears has a version of the Rolling Stones' "Satisfaction." Arrrrrrrgh. Speaking of B Spears though, Travis does a really funny cover of "Baby One More Time." They sing it so serious and acoustic-guitar-y, man it's great.

-- Anonymous, July 07, 2000

I probably shouldn't even bother posting because Jamie just said everything I was thinking :P Goddamn you :P

1. Britney Spears should NOT do 'Satisfaction' (duh, Rolling Stones. I'm fifteen and I know it, oh god I need a life). NOTHING IS SACRED ANYMORE.

2. One rip off I absolutely adore is TRAVIS. Get the 'why does it always rain on me' single, and track #4 is Baby One More Time. It's like a guitar-acoustic-version, with people in the background chiming in and everything. Basically, he sounds like he's really depressed, and personally I like it more than Britney. Travis are cool.

And Madonna shall perish in flames for American Pie. I adore the Don McLean one, and I originally got excited when I heard Madonna was releasing it. Then I heard it. Problem is, all my friends adore it. Urghghgh.

-- Anonymous, July 08, 2000

I don't even know the name of this boy band (somebody help me out here), but they sing that song that goes: "I like girls who wear Abercrombie and Fitch.." I think it's called "Summer Girls"... but anyway, I'm fine with all their wailing and I'm sitting through it cause there is nothing else on the radio and then I hear "I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike". (-Beastie Boys). Holy shit. I was livid. These little phony kids have absolutely no business quoting legends such as my B-Boys. Hell no. By the way... Rhyme and Reason 2000 tour is coming up with Beasties/Rage Against the Machine and special guests in each city.. possibly the Roots, De La Soul, At The Drive In... Awww motherfuckin yeah....

-- Anonymous, July 08, 2000

It really depressed me when the '80s covers started coming out. Am I that old already?

The one that cracked me up was Jay-Z sampling "Hard Knock Life" from the Annie soundtrack. Who knew tough ass Jay-Z was a closet show queen?

-- Anonymous, July 09, 2000

How come no-one mentioned Puffy yet? Doing that rip-off of Every Breath You Take was bad enough, but jeez, then he even managed to persuade Jimmy Page to do that remake of Kashmir!

On a more positive note, anyone ever heard Noa's version of Material Girl? One voice, one guitar and even a few licks from Purple Haze! Hearing is believing.....

-- Anonymous, July 09, 2000

Ooooo, Stijn, I could kill Puff Daddy for what he did to Kashmir. I wrote about it, instead.

And hearing David Bowie's 'Rebel Rebel' on a car commercial nearly made me cry.
The music industry sucks, sometimes.

Animate.

-- Anonymous, July 09, 2000

Laura- The Abercrombie and Fitch boy-band is LFO.

-- Anonymous, July 09, 2000

Oh yeah! How could I forget Puffy! Must've been repressing painful memories of his song covers. .... That Jay-Z "Hard Knock Life" about made me fall out of my friend's moving car laughing the first time I heard it. It's sooooooo bad.

-- Anonymous, July 09, 2000

Hip-hop is generally such a shitty style of music that most of it annoys rather than amuses me, although the other day I did get quite a laugh out of that song that samples "Rapture," the old Blondie tune. I was in my car, spinning the radio dial, DESPERATE for something to listen to while I was stuck in traffic, when I came across "Rapture". Except, the beat was all screwy, and there were all these weird little blips and poots that didn't belong there. It quickly became apparent that the DJ was fucking up, and playing two songs at once. I was having a good laugh at this poor DJ's expense, when I suddenly realized that this WASN'T a mistake, after all! This was somebody's idea of a "new" song! Every time I think hip-hop has sunk as low as it can fuckin' sink...

Oh, and that thing where Mariah Carey sings over the old Tom Tom Club song? That makes my ears bleed.

Music has never, ever been worse than it is right this instant. I mean, nothing short of a nerve gas attack at the next MTV awards is gonna get us out of this mess...

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Another one that pisses me off-- Pearl Jam doing "Last Kiss". It was a terrible song the first time it came out, and Eddie Vedder singing it off-key doesn't make it any better. Get over yourself Eddie. We have.

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Oh Heather - I didn't even THINK of that one, but that one pisses me off too. I think Eddie sounds like Goat Boy when he sings Last Kiss.

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

A lot of times, the remakes are better than the originals. Let me cite a few examples:

"Dancing Queen" by Sixpence None the Richer is an infinitely better version than Abba's. It's faster-paced and better-sung, in my opinion.

"Mamma Mia" by the A-Teens is a much better version than Abba's as well.

"Sweet Child o' Mine" by Sheryl Crow beats the dog water out of any other version.

"There She Goes," a song which has been re-done a thousand times, was done best by Sixpence None the Richer.

First isn't always best. I never did like Abba much anyway. ;)

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Ay! How can you support Sixpence none the richer? Hearing the lead singer's baby voice and the whimpy, shoegazerless guitar sucks out all the pleasure from There She Goes, which is one of the most sigh inducing, lovely songs EVER. And I heard their version of Dancing Queen in a store, and I left the store...as it was aural torture to my ears.

But to each their own. it's just a cover.

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

I agree that sometimes a cover is better. Elvis did a better "Blue Suede Shoes" than Perkins, and Frank Sinatra did a better "My Way" (I don't think it was his song origionally-- Wendy, please correct me). I happen to love "I've Just Seen a Face" by Holly Cole, even though the Beatles wrote and recorded it first. Actually, Cole does a lot of covers of traditional jazz tunes, and she re-workes them her own way. Has anyone heard her version of Tom Waites's "Tango 'Till They're Sore"? In my oppinion, it's better and sexier than the origional. And I really love Concrete Blondes' "Tomorrow, Wendy" and "Everybody Knows"-- they aren't better than the origional, but they're great! Natalie Imbruglia covered "Torn" and I remember she got blasted for it, because other singers had done it around the same time. She just fired back that she never wrote it, she just ripped it off like everyone else. And it's a great song!

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

last week metallica's sad but true came on the radio so i cranked it up, only to be assaulted by kid rock's american badass instead. i can't believe my ears didn't start bleeding.

ok, so i don't like bryan adams, but i'd much rather hear please forgive me than that lonestar amazed song. a more subtle rip off, but a rip off just the same.

and cheryl crow's sweet child o mine? ick ick ick

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

I just heard Fiona Apple's cover of "Nothing's Gonna Change My World" (The Beatles, right?) and I thought it was pretty damn good. Ditto for Aerosmith's cover of "Come Together" - personally, I think it's better than the original (ducks for cover). The Presidents of the United States of America (who really need to get a shorter name) also did a good job on "Video Killed the Radio Star."

But what was with Orgy's "Blue Monday"?? Was I the only person who thought that it sucked royally?! Same goes for Marilyn Manson's "Sweet Dreams" - don't touch Annie Lennox, man.

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

mia, re: presidents of the united states of america

they did get a shorter name, actually. i believe they actually disbanded and got back together, and now they're just the presidents.

i have this space reserved in my brain for just such useless facts, you see.

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

I was flipping through stations on my car radio a couple of weeks ago, and came across Led Zeppelin's Ten Years Gone. My favorite Zep song, cool. Hhmm, I thought, this sounds like a live version. Then that poor sap from Black Crowes starting squawking -- good God! He sounded like he was shitting tacks. I was reflecting on how great Robert Plant's voice really was (in comparison), when the BC guy began singing off key. Click, off ya go. I'm sorry, that is a capital offense. If you can't sing in tune, stay away from the mike, damn it. (This is why I *never* go to karaoke. Ever.)

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Heather,

Thank your brain for me. :)

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Does anyone remember the r&b song that featured (I believe it was) Vivaldi's Four Seasons in the background with some whiny moron singing over it? Every time I hear it I want to do a drive-by on that girl's producer's house. ERRRGH dina

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Here's something scary. My husband was with a group of people from work driving to a luncheon. The young (mid-20s) women he was with had just bought the just-released gawdawful Madonna cover of "American Pie" and gave it to him to play. So he says something about how they must've cut several minutes off of the original and they say... (you can guess?)

"What original?"

I kid you not. Argh.

-- Anonymous, July 10, 2000

Julie, that poem is SO right on the money.

I have to disagree with Kate, though, about the Ten Years Gone version by Page & the Crowes. Sure, the vocals are off-key, but the recording was made in concert. Robert Plant has been known to foul things up on stage as well, if I remember correctly. The first time I saw Zep in concert (January 11 1975, Rotterdam) he even forgot the lyrics to Stairway to Heaven! As a case in point, I give you this collection of bootleg mp3's at http://members.tripod.com/~nileppez/seattle.html, recorded only two months after the aforementioned show.

-- Anonymous, July 11, 2000

mia, re: Beatles song

The name of the song Fiona Apple redid is "Across the Universe" and I have to agree (and this is a mjor thing for me cause I am a HUGE Beatles fan) that its better than the original. Her voice is much better suited to it than the Beatles.

And I know no one else will know this but me, but, in the case of many oldies songs, the remake is better than the original (in my opinion). Example: "Dedicated to the One I Love" by the Mamas and the Papas was orginally done by some girl group in the '50s and remade by the M&Ps...the remake is approximately 30,000 times better:)

However, I do loathe many of the above ("American Pie", Jessica Simpson's "Jack and Diane" sample, just about anything by Puff Daddy), however, the one I hate the most would have to be the Lemonhead's reamke of "Mrs. Robinson". ICCCCCCCCK!!!!! I love Simon and Garfunkel AND The Graduate and that was just atrocious!!!

-- Anonymous, July 11, 2000

I have to agree with Allyson and others about Fiona Apple's version of "Across the Universe". Like Allyson, I'm a HUGE Beatles fan, but when we went to see "Pleasantville", I actually stayed through the credits to hear the song. She has such a smooth voice, it really was perfect for the song.

And I have NO problem with remakes that are better than the original, especially if they're remakes of songs that weren't all that popular the first time around. Like, I had no idea that Mamas & Papas song wasn't theirs. And how many times has "I Heard It Through The Grapevine" been done? Who did it originally - Aretha? Marvin Gaye? CCR?

A few nights ago I was watching a Behind The Music or whatever, on Studio 54. In the background, they played bits of old R&B/disco type songs.. and I bet half the songs I heard have been sampled in recent songs by Will Smith. Why can't the guy write his OWN stuff? It can't be THAT HARD to write notes in a different order than in which they have already been written, can it?

-- Anonymous, July 11, 2000

Heather (Pocketwitch),

Paul Anka originally wrote My Way for Sinatra's first retirement back in the '70's. Yes, his version is historical fact. The better version is by Elvis, but I can't keep a straight face hearing it, since the King never did anything HIS way, he just did what the Colonel told him to do.

-- Anonymous, July 11, 2000

Wendy:

Thanks. I knew you'd set me straight.

-- Anonymous, July 11, 2000

Oh god, Will Smith! I forgot about that thing where he sings over "Rock the Casbah." That made every single inch of my body hurt. Man, Will Smith should just be... set on fire. OK, that's too mean, but couldn't somebody just PINCH him real hard? I mean, one of those pinches that leaves a big, gnarly bruise?

-- Anonymous, July 12, 2000

Alana Davis covering Ani DIfRanco's "32 Flavors". someone please kill me. and limp bizkit is now sampling the mission impossible theme - for NO REASON whatoever, so stupid.

but [and im ashamed to say it] Britney Spears' version of Satisfaction isnt that bad.

-- Anonymous, July 12, 2000

The ENTIRE A-Teens CD is ABBA covers. How cheesy is that?

-- Anonymous, July 12, 2000

Oh, and then there's that whole Windows Operating System...which I happen to be using right now, but still, the fact remains that it ripped-off Apple, just switched all the folders to the left side of the screen and called the trash bin the 'recycling' bin...

And yes, Britney Spear's version of Satisfaction is hell with fake boobs! Why did she have to do that?

As far as American Pie goes, yes, like many of my generation I heard Madonna's version before Don McCleans, and once I had heard the original, I still liked Madonna's better. If only for the buttcracks.

I hate Social Distortion's version of Johnny Cash's 'Ring of Fire'. Patooey!

And...I don't know how many of you are familiar with this, but there's a Spanish version of Sesame Street called Plaza Sesamo. It's exactly the same as the original except Big Bird is green. Green?! Talk about your cheap imitations!

-- Anonymous, July 13, 2000

There's an awful cover of R.E.M.'s "Everybody Hurts" by this Irish fiddly band, the Corrs. It was shamelessly soulless...

-- Anonymous, July 13, 2000

Alexa - Limp Bizkit didn't sample the "Mission Impossible" theme, they played it, in a remake of it called "Now I Know Why You Hate Me", which was the theme for "Mission Impossible 2".

Just so you know..! =D

-- Anonymous, July 13, 2000

Plaza Sesamo...actually, it's not the same as Sesame Street. It's a Hispanic-American version of it. There is no Big Bird, but there is Abelardo, who is an 8 1/2 foot tall green parrot.

-- Anonymous, July 13, 2000

Ok.. since this thread has kinda branched from "Rip-offs that piss you off" to "Rip-offs that kick ass", I had to throw in these two:

1) Like about a million other people who've already posted, I really, really dig Fiona Apple's "Across the Universe." Heavy rotation on my WinAmp,kids.

2) I like and respect the Stones and all, but I have to admit that The Sunday's rendition of "Wild Horses" stomps Mick Jagger's whiny, nasaly bleat in to da earf.

Word.

-- Anonymous, July 13, 2000

I actually quite like remakes when they're done well - if the new singer add something to the song. God will probably strike me down for saying it, but I didn't mind that Puff Daddy/Sting song - I think a lot of good songs have been remade with rap.

However, a straight remake is as boring as hell and just sounds like somebody singing along with the radio - nil originality.

The only band I can't stand hearing covered is Crowded House. Their stuff is perfect. You can't do it better. Leave it alone!

-- Anonymous, July 14, 2000

Will Smith, the most notorious un-original song writer in the world. Try listeninf to "And the Beat Goes on", or "Send me forget me nots", and you be sure to reconize the beats in the Will songs,"Miami",and "Men in Black". In fact i'm sure you could find a song that matches the beat of every different song he has that just happens to be produced 2 decades before his reguritated crap.

-- Anonymous, February 24, 2002

Awww man, all of those *ucking commercials about bran flakes, feminine hygine sprays, and prescription medicines that could kill 90% of the population due to their side-effects, man! I cannot stand it! They all cover great, uncoverable tunes from the 60's (most of which are amazing Beatles tunes. What the hell is going on in this country? And why the hell did the Beatles sell the rights to the greatest songs ever written? It makes no sense to me! Michael Jackson? Give me a break! That guy is a clown...he obviously doesn't have the intelligence and character to preserve sacred songs by not buying them in the first place. To me, great art such as this does not have a price tag big enough to respectfully grace its fragile existence. If anyone from those cheap-ass record companies or advertising agencies is reading this, PLEASE, in the name of all that does not suck, DO NOT EVER touch any song EVER again damnit! Oh, by the way, SCREW YOU to the following people: Brittany Spears (you suck), Limp Biscuit (you suck major ass and I refuse to misspell "biscuit" just to write your retarded-ass name), Madonna (you suck...well I don't even want to think about what you suck!), Puff Daddy (you blow gay goat's penis, and every other rapper in the world), Will Smith (had to add him in there), Eddie Vedder(your version of "You've Got To Hide Your Love Away" really sucks ass), ALL of the Boy Bands (including New Kids On The Block)..........oh yeah, and Hanson!

Later,

PEACE and Music.......

-- Anonymous, February 25, 2002