Match Number 7

17 December 1996, Coventry at Highfield Road again! We lost 2-1 in another of that string of piss-poor results that did for Keegan. Huckerby and McAllister scored in the first half and Shearer pulled one back after an hour. Still a lineup to die for...

Points Srnicek 1 Watson 2 Elliott 2 Peacock 2 Albert 2 Lee 1 (booked) Beardsley 2 Gillespie 2 Ginola 2 Shearer 4 (goal) Ferdinand 2

Results: Match 7

BBS Premier Corinthian League

Athletico Backworth	1-0	Woodstock County
Barton's Samba	2-1	Yelli's Yobs
Beardo United	4-3	MinesaS&N Academicals
Borussia Canwehaveourballbach	2-2	Pilgrim's Converts
Brewery Droopers United	4-2	Proper Lard Unathletic
Dabizas Pleazas	1-0	Steph's Superstars
Duncan's Disorderlies	1-1	Toon Goons
MacBeth's Marauders	2-0	Wallsend Old Boys

Barton's Samba triple their goals for total and rocket up out of the drop zone...extraordinary!

BBS Notionless League Division 1

Baxter Basics	2-2	The Gallowgate
Blaydon Racers	2-2	The Stellar Warriors
Carlisle United Revisited	2-1	Jessie's High Pants
Chevy's Choppers	1-1	Pete's Porkie Pies
Corinthian Smart-Casuals	2-2	Quantum Mechanicals
Dudley Boys	2-0	Real Zaragossy
Howdon Harriers	2-2	Screacher's Creatures
ITK Heaton World Beaters	1-2	Spayne

How many draws? This new system is throwing up some interesting results...

BBS Notionless League Division 2

Bewildered De Builders	2-2	Toon Gutter Snipes
Ceptic	0-4	Unaccountable Wild-elf Bottles
Doomed United	1-1	Real Seghill
Douglas All Boys (B) Team	4-0	Sexy Boys
FC Forget-Me-Nots	0-2	Shilbottle WMC
FC Jumpers for Goal Posts	3-1	SS Enterprise
Gallowgateaserai	1-1	Superstitious FC
Preston Big End	5-5	The Entertainers

Epic 5-5 between Preston Big End and The Entertainers - commemorative videos and scarves already churning out of garages all over Tyneside :-)

BBS Premier Corinthian League Table

Position	Team	Won	Dwn	Lst	G/F	G/A	G/Dif	Points
1	Pilgrim's Converts	6	1	0	25	5	20	19
2	Yelli's Yobs	5	1	1	21	12	9	16
3	Steph's Superstars	5	1	1	15	6	9	16
4	Brewery Droopers United	5	0	2	17	9	8	15
5	MinesaS&N Academicals	4	1	2	18	10	8	13
6	Athletico Backworth	3	2	2	16	14	2	11
7	Beardo United	3	2	2	18	17	1	11
8	Woodstock County	3	1	3	11	9	2	10
9	Dabizas Pleazas	3	0	4	9	18	-9	9
10	Borussia Canwehaveourballbach	2	2	3	19	15	4	8
11	MacBeth's Marauders	2	1	4	6	13	-7	7
12	Proper Lard Unathletic	2	0	5	7	14	-7	6
13	Barton's Samba	2	0	5	3	15	-12	6
14	Toon Goons	1	2	4	11	16	-5	5
15	Duncan's Disorderlies	1	1	5	4	14	-10	4
16	Wallsend Old Boys	1	1	5	7	19	-12	4

BBS Notionless League Division 1 Table

Position	Team	Won	Dwn	Lst	G/F	G/A	G/Dif	Points
1	The Stellar Warriors	4	3	0	22	11	11	15
2	Howdon Harriers	4	2	1	25	13	12	14
3	Quantum Mechanicals	4	2	1	15	9	6	14
4	Spayne	4	1	2	14	11	3	13
5	Carlisle United Revisited	3	3	1	15	12	3	12
6	Blaydon Racers	3	1	3	18	11	7	10
7	Screacher's Creatures	2	4	1	14	11	3	10
8	Jessie's High Pants	3	1	3	9	12	-3	10
9	Dudley Boys	2	3	2	10	10	0	9
10	Corinthian Smart-Casuals	2	2	3	8	14	-6	8
11	ITK Heaton World Beaters	2	1	4	7	10	-3	7
12	Baxter Basics	2	1	4	9	14	-5	7
13	Real Zaragossy	2	1	4	9	15	-6	7
14	The Gallowgate	1	3	3	11	22	-11	6
15	Pete's Porkie Pies	1	2	4	4	10	-6	5
16	Chevy's Choppers	0	4	3	9	14	-5	4

BBS Notionless League Division 2 Table

Position	Team	Won	Dwn	Lst	G/F	G/A	G/Dif	Points
1	Preston Big End	5	2	0	21	10	11	17
2	FC Jumpers for Goal Posts	4	3	0	21	7	14	15
3	The Entertainers	4	2	1	29	12	17	14
4	Douglas All Boys (B) Team	4	1	2	20	20	0	13
5	FC Forget-Me-Nots	4	1	2	11	11	0	13
6	Shilbottle WMC	3	3	1	13	9	4	12
7	Bewildered De Builders	2	5	0	18	13	5	11
8	Unaccountable Wild-elf Bottles	3	1	3	11	13	-2	10
9	Real Seghill	2	3	2	14	10	4	9
10	SS Enterprise	1	3	3	11	13	-2	6
11	Gallowgateaserai	1	3	3	7	11	-4	6
12	Superstitious FC	1	3	3	15	24	-9	6
13	Ceptic	2	0	5	8	21	-13	6
14	Toon Gutter Snipes	1	2	4	11	11	0	5
15	Doomed United	1	2	4	7	14	-7	5
16	Sexy Boys	1	0	6	3	21	-18	3

Fixtures: Match 8

BBS Premier Corinthian League

Yelli's Yobs	Vs	Athletico Backworth
MinesaS&N Academicals	Vs	Barton's Samba
Pilgrim's Converts	Vs	Beardo United
Proper Lard Unathletic	Vs	Borussia Canwehaveourballbach
Steph's Superstars	Vs	Brewery Droopers United
Toon Goons	Vs	Dabizas Pleazas
Wallsend Old Boys	Vs	Duncan's Disorderlies
Woodstock County	Vs	MacBeth's Marauders

BBS Notionless League Division 1

The Stellar Warriors	Vs	Baxter Basics
Jessie's High Pants	Vs	Blaydon Racers
Pete's Porkie Pies	Vs	Carlisle United Revisited
Quantum Mechanicals	Vs	Chevy's Choppers
Real Zaragossy	Vs	Corinthian Smart-Casuals
Screacher's Creatures	Vs	Dudley Boys
Spayne	Vs	Howdon Harriers
The Gallowgate	Vs	ITK Heaton World Beaters

BBS Notionless League Division 2

Unaccountable Wild-elf Bottles	Vs	Bewildered De Builders
Real Seghill	Vs	Ceptic
Sexy Boys	Vs	Doomed United
Shilbottle WMC	Vs	Douglas All Boys (B) Team
SS Enterprise	Vs	FC Forget-Me-Nots
Superstitious FC	Vs	FC Jumpers for Goal Posts
The Entertainers	Vs	Gallowgateaserai
Toon Gutter Snipes	Vs	Preston Big End

Only 5 unbeaten records now: Pilgrim, Galaxy, clarky, Tom and De Builder...who will be last one standing?

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

Answers

Its official. We're p@p. Time for a mid season break.

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

Don't be too downhearted, the Stottie Cup begins soon (Corinthian League Cup).

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

Phew!!!!! It`s tough at the top!!! That was a close one!(:o)

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

Softie,
Would it be a lot of trouble to publish a list of who's managing which teams?
The pressure is starting to get to me, and I need to know who's plotting my downfall, other than the tabloids!

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

I'll publish a full list of teams again and also the complete fixture list tomorrow. The thread entitled "BBS Corinthian League Week 1 Fixtures" has the full list of teams in it the 'Corithian League' series of threads.

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

Well, that wasn't one of our better performances. Obviously I didn't pick the right men for the job. That's important you know. You have to have the right tools for the job in hand and tonight we had more jobs in hand than tools.

I'm still very, very disappointed in our performance in front of gaol. It's criminal. But with such limited resources we will have to do our best and look for some superhuman performances. I'm still waiting for most of the team to turn up. Tonight only two players turned up and no matter who the opposition is two is not usually enough to come out on top.

We will of course have to learn from tonight's defeat. We're not downheated. No, FC Don't-you-forget-us Football Club will be back, starting tomorrow against Captain Slog and his crew on the SS Enterprise. From what I know of their striker he has ears even bigger than young Jaffas and he could be a handful. They'll be a hard team to break down. They'll put up their defensive shields and will be hard to penetrate.

They've also got some interesting sounding foreigners. For instance I've heard that Ru Uhu will stick to anybody but they can't cling on to a lead. Of course they've come a long way. Further than anybody in the past and no doubt they will go a lot further into the future. But their strength is not in the day to day league. No, they are a team who will do well on foreign soil. You mark my words, they'll reach the Galactic Cup Final Frontier.

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

Softie,
Thanks - I've found it. Unfortunately, some clever pseudonyms cleverly mask some of my main opponents - denying me the opportunity to play some Taggart-esque mind games with them. Acutally, it's just as well, I'd probably psyche myself out rather than them.

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

A win against Steph's Superstars!@!! My first win ever against Steph. I'll never understand this thing even if Softie shows me his spreadsheet but we're out of the dreaded relegation zone (not for long says Ciara).

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

Hi Pete, the average in the Premiership was 10.5 (1 goal) and you scored 10 and Steph 9. This would have been a draw under the new rules, but you had home advantage which boosted you to a 12. Since Steph was below average but you hadn't got much more than above average, I gave you a 1-0 victory as you hadn't done enough to merit 2-1 compared with the other scores.

This is the new version of Bistro Mathematics as described by Douglas Adams, I tell you!

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

4-0 away from home - yo ho.

-- Anonymous, July 04, 2000

Effing hell.....I really am turning us into a Dalglish'esque type team!!! Bloddy draws and home defeats everywhere!!

Right.....time to change my tactics to something more Robson'esque methinks!!

-- Anonymous, July 05, 2000

So the South Coast derby threw up a draw at the Parc de Pints. A little gutted that we threw away our home advantage but a draw against the top side isn't too bad.

-- Anonymous, July 05, 2000

Well the Bewildered DeBuilders remain unbeaten but we've had more draws than John Wayne and Clint Eastwood. Upturn in fortunes needed or else BEAVER will be weeping.

-- Anonymous, July 05, 2000

Don't let BEAVER weep over your drawers.

I'm sure the sticky patch will be over within a week.

-- Anonymous, July 05, 2000

Geordie - I forgot it was a South Coast derby - I get confused with all the names, team names, nicknames etc. It`s my age you know!(:o)

-- Anonymous, July 05, 2000

I'll include the managers' names on the results & fixtures in future - I reckon some of them are ringers mind!

-- Anonymous, July 05, 2000