Ok .. My ex boyfriend called me about a week ago (which is not a rare thing because we are still great friends, or at least were) and informed me that his father had passed away. I was heartbroken since I was good friends with his dad as well. I gave him my condolences and we made plans to meet for dinner sometime next week. Tonight, I was at the grocery store.. and.. walking toward me... his dad. I talked to him like everything was normal, but went home & called the ex to confront him. Turns out he is just a huge liar. Didn't even have any kind of excuse .. but then again.. how could you? Have you ever caught somebody in a lie like that? I was shocked.. lying about how much you make or something.. yeah.. it happens.. but.. your own fathers death?? I don't get it..

-- Anonymous, June 18, 2000

Answers

I think he was looking for a sympathy piece of ex-girlfriend booty!

SCUM. Add this to your list of reasons that you are glad that you're still not dating him. and put his number on call blocker.

-- Anonymous, June 18, 2000

That's really kinda sick.

DumbAss, my h.s.b.f., pulled a number of lies on me (in the name of "seeing what my reaction would be")... like telling me he'd been married and had a child, or had dated this girl (*points to picture of head cheerleader*) at his old school or had another girlfriend and "what's wrong with that?" or "listen to this tape, this is me singing" (he was in a band with friends).... I, being insecure, pathetic and teenaged, fell for it every time... and never questioned the mentality of someone who'd think that stuff like this was in any way acceptable....

Past tense "friends" is right, Kat.... Wotta loser!

-- Anonymous, June 18, 2000

Ooooh, Wendy, tell them about Nacim!

My parents have a "friend" named Doug who has been telling people that

a) he used to live with my parents until my brother broke up with his girlfriend and moved home, and

b) he's been ordained as a minister in the Anglican church.

My parents know better than to have Doug movein with them. They'd never get rid of him, and would likely lose every penny they had. Also, my brother got engaged at Christmas, and he and Kerry are doing quite well, than you very much.

He's also been spreading lies about my father in order to keep him from becoming the pastor at his church.

Mom and Dad found out about that one from another friend in the church yesterday. Also, Doug is a bit of a klepto as well as a liar. He's been fired from many a job because he can't keep his fingers out of the till. He'll also scoop up cash if he's at your house and he sees some lying around. My father and a bunch of his friends just started up a cleaning business, and the consensus was that they didn't want Doug involved, because what if some money went missing from one of their clients? He can't be trusted. So last week, when the church (where Doug has a room) was broken into and the cash box with several weeks worth of collection was stolen, guess where suspicion fell? Especially when you consider that it was obviously and inside job.

He wants to become a minister (and claims he is to several people). My father (Who is a minister himself) is wrestling with the idea of of calling the bishop and explaining the situation to him. Dad doesn't like ratting on people, but he can't let someone like Doug represent the church. Doug seems to think that if you wear a Big Fucking Cross (You should see this thing) and hang pictures of the Blessed Virgin Mary in your room, then you're a Christian and a minister.

The worst thing is that my father had tried to help Doug. When his marriage was on the rocks, when he lost yet another job, whenever Doug was in trouble, my parents tried to help. And this is how he pays them back.

I want to give this guy a call and bitch him out. How dare he take advantage of my parents (they've loaned him money when they barely had enough for themselves), and then drag their names through the mud like that? I can't do that, though, because that might give him more storytelling amunition.

-- Anonymous, June 19, 2000

i had something *kinda* similair happen to me in college. nothing as serious as lying about a death, but strange, nevertheless.

i dated this guy for a few months, and after we broke up we tried to remain friends (key word - *tried*).... anyway, he told me he had cheated on me while we were dating - not true.... and he also told me he had an aunt in beverly hills that wanted him to come live with her after he graduated and get into the movie biz... supposedly she had this mansion and he could just live there for nothing and concentrate on getting his career off the ground. - also not true.

this is someone that i thought was super well-adjusted... just seemed to have his shit together. i felt like i didn't know him AT ALL when i found out these were lies. he just said things to impress people all the time and none of it was true.

needless to say, we're not friends anymore - i don't believe a word that comes out of his mouth. people are strange.

-- Anonymous, June 19, 2000

Along the same lines...

I knew a guy who used that excuse at work once. It made me rather ill. He was out of PTO and *really* needed a day off for some unforeseen reason, so instead of being honest with our manager about it, he claimed that a grandparent or something had passed away in order to get 3 days off. Well, one of my friends had been close to him, and she also happened to be the chair of our team who bought cards for birthdays, put up banners, and consequently, purchased the bereavement cards. He told her, and she played along with his farce and bought a sympathy card and passed it around to our entire team! I refused to sign it. She told me about the lie (big mistake), and she also swore me to secrecy, so I couldn't tell anyone else about it. Having to maintain that lie made me feel even more sick. That's the worst. You could almost add that to the forum thread. Ever find out about a sick lie, but due to a promise you gave, you were sworn to keeping it? Bleh.

Ugh. That made me think of another one. I knew a girl in high school who had an abortion. She told me who the father was afterward (we're talking months afterward), and made me promise that I would never tell *HIM*, because he would have refused the abortion. The freakish irony was that I had happened to be dating him when this confession came to me. Talk about being stuck between a rock and a hard place. I never told, either. I've never really gotten past that one.

-- Anonymous, June 19, 2000

A college friend of mine said he was a photographer for Associated Press. The Gulf War was underway and so he went over there to photograph for it. I asked him to bring me back some relic, like a grenade pin. He came back when the war was over all shaken up with stories of "the sand, man..." and all the things he had seen, and presented me with a butterfly knife he'd gotten there. Months later I found out that he'd been tending bar in Texas the whole time and wasn't even a photographer, let alone an AP one. Wonder where he got that knife, though?

-- Anonymous, June 19, 2000

umm.. Swap Meet?? no, no .. Garage Sale!

-- Anonymous, June 20, 2000

Wendy told me that I could explain the Nas thing, so I'll give you the Reader's Digest version:

Wendy has had this friend Nacim for a bunch of years. They're such good friends that they agreed to move in together when Wendy got back to Montreal. In March, about a week or so before she was about to leave, Nas calls Wendy and tells her he had an inoperable brain tumour. It's not fatal yet, because they caught in on time, but he's going for chemo and radiation and stuff.

Now of course Wendy's all freaked out, because both her parents died of cancer. As a matter of fact, before Wendy was born, her mother had a brain tumour. So she's a little sensitive about the topic, duh. Naturally, she's concerned for her friend. They still arange to move in with each other, and Wendy has nightmares about nursing Nas through his illness.

Wendy moves in March, and she and Nas find an apartment. They move in, and Nas buys appliances (In Montreal, not all places come with a fridge/stove/washer/dryer). Then he and Wendy have a huge fight. Monumentally huge. When the dust clears about a week later, she and Nas agree to try again. He has the lease transferred to her name, and he promises that he'll stay until at least August, but that he will likely leave after that.

Last week, Nas decided to tell Wendy that he's leaving on July 1 (For those who aren't from Montreal, Canada Day is also Moving Day). He's found an apartment and signed a lease. He had aparently done that BEFORE he told Wendy he'd stay until August.

As for the brain tumour, nothing has been mentioned about it since March. I'm sorry, but you don't cure a tumour in less than a month. He told Wendy that he'd gone for chemo and radiation. That was before Wendy moved back, and there's been no further treatments since then. Wendy knows that Nas used to have a tendancy to lie about stuff, but it was usually little things. But a brain tumour? And what about the promise he made?

I'm a little angry about this, too, because Nas always struck me as being a decent guy. But lying about a brain tumour?

-- Anonymous, June 21, 2000

And people wonder why Lorena Bobbitt did what she did .

-- Anonymous, June 21, 2000

You said it better than I could have. Thanks, Heather. Over the years, I have become a kind of oncology expert (I didn't have a choice!). I know what someone with cancer looks like. nacim does not look like one of these people. His supposed first dose of radiation was three days before I arrived home. Radiation requires the shin to be marked with special dyes that do not wash off. You only get rid of them when your skin layers change. Technically, he should still have them. I never saw any to begin with. Nor did he lose any of the enamel on his teeth, which is a side effect that is nearly universal. Chemo seemed to leave him totally unaffected, as well. From my understanding, he would be taking large doses in a short period of time. This does more damage than prolonged treatment. Hair, nails, appetite, and blood iron count should all be affected. He looked healthier when I came home than he has in years. I hope that's the cancer i get!! Maybe with that kind I can live to be 100!! Then there's the appartment thing, but that's still too tender for me to get into. Maybe someday.

-- Anonymous, June 21, 2000

Why is it only women are answering this question?

Don't you men out there have some crazies in your closet?

I once dated a girl in high school who kept telling me that if I broke up with her, she was going to kill herself. Being all of 14, I thought that she really meant it, so I called her father who told me that "She does this all of the time. Just ignore it."

I wonder who needs help?

-- Anonymous, June 21, 2000

Katherine,

That reminds me of a girl in high school who decided her life was too well-adjusted and so she told people she had been raped and had an abortion. Later she admitted to a couple of us that it wasn't at all true. WHY would you lie about something horrible?! I can understand saying "Oh my family is so rich" or "I did this and that and blablabla" but why say you were *raped* if it's not true? How can you be so jealous of everyone else's misfortunes that you wish you had some too? Jesus...

Eric, don't get me started on men and their exes. My boyfriend is still trying to get his ex off our backs and out of our lives and is still explaining to her that NO he really DOESN'T want to get back together and that after us being together for almost a year and a half that perhaps she should move on now.

Yeesh.

-- Anonymous, June 27, 2000