Do you guys have any "regional jokes" or controversies like MidAmerica Airport in your area?

-- Anonymous, June 12, 2000

Answers

Here's another one, but it's more like a "town joke." There's a church in Lebanon that used to be a bowling alley. People have lots of fun with that one.

-- Anonymous, June 12, 2000

My town is so small they make stupid jokes aobut the size and how everyone's related to one another.

I live about an hour from chicago. The rates are like $2.25 for a gallon of regualr. In the city (with the tax on gas in the inner city) is probably nearing $4.00 or so. Thank God my parents pay for my gas or I would be spending my whole paycheck on gas.

-- Anonymous, June 12, 2000

Well, it's not like everyone in the whole city jokes about this, but my dad and I are always making fun of it because it's so unknown. Like, one time we were talking about those quarters and I said the only one I gave a shit about was the new york one.

"I'm waiting for the New York quarter"

"I'm waiting for the Dearborn Heights one"

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2000

One of the big current things around here (Hampton, VA) is this thing called Presidents Park... Some guy wants to put 30-foot tall busts of all the Presidents of the United States in a park in York County. He's been fighting the County Board to get it zoned as a park and not an amusement, but the Board says no, because they know how STUPID this project is.

Other than that, we've been laughing at the "city" of Poquoson for years... They just recently celebrated getting their second traffic light! Yay!

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2000

Besides MidAmerica, I guess the biggest regional joke would probably be the entire town of Fenton MO. Everyone loves to joke about how "at least they don't live in Fenton", "Everyone in Fenton thinks that Fenton is the greatest place ever," etc. No one ever leaves Fenton, they just migrate in. It's the Black Hole of St. Louis County.

Speaking of which, they're never going to finish construction on 270 in our lifetimes, are they Katie?

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2000

How about, are they ever going to finish construction on *70*? Driving towards Lambert, there's about 80 lane shifts and all that crap, and everyone's driving about 90 miles an hour through the things. People drive crazier than I do in St. Louis, I swear. Thank God for the Metrolink.

Although, what's the deal with Metrolink? I know they're expanding it east, to Fairview Heights and MidAmerica (cough), but are they ever going to have some type of north-south routes? It just seems like any other city with any type of light-rail system has it going all over the place, not just straight east-west. But whatever, I suppose.

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2000

Man... and we complain when gas gets up to $1.50....... I guess I'll keep my mouth shut from now on =)

Jen, you're not talking about Dearborn Heights, Michigan are you??

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2000

Here's another one: The "village" of Summerfield. No, it's not a town, it's a village. There's about 500 people there, and it consists entirely of bars, trailers, crappy houses, a post office the size of an outhouse, and one school that is grades 1-5. Then everyone there is shipped over to Lebanon for junior high/high school. Lucky us.

It's always been a joke that everyone there is related. There are about three last names in that town, I swear. It's also filled with guys who seem to be a little historically and geographically confused: This is not the South, and it is not, you know, the 1860s. Sorry guys.

Thanks to that attitude, there isn't a black person in the entire village. Actually, there's like one black family in all of Clinton County. Seriously. Well, I guess Summerfield is still technically St. Clair County, but it's right on the edge of it, so it might as well be in Clinton County. It's weird, though. Everyone in St. Clair County calls Clinton County "Hick County" and stuff like that. Not that there aren't hicks over here... holy shit.

Here's another weird kind of thing. I don't know if you guys have ever heard of Ski (I'm not sure if it's just made around here or what), but it's this drink that is like, The Drink of Clinton County, Illinois. No one here in St. Clair County drinks the stuff (they don't even sell it here), but once you cross the county line, that's all anyone drinks. It's unheard of to drink, say, Mt. Dew over there or something. No. You drink Ski. I don't even think they sell Mt. Dew in that county... it's just Ski. It's so weird. And you know what? Ski is the absolute nastiest shit I have ever tasted in my life. Ughghghghgh.

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2000

Man, gas is only $1.29 here. Sucks for y'all

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2000

Like on the Simpsons, when Homer went south and all they sold was Fudd instead of Duff.

-dan

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2000

The town I live in is known for our corn and our porn.

Several years ago, the beloved insane farmer made the "amazing maize maze," the biggest maze made out of a corn field in the USA. Oh boy, isn't that exciting? So, we're known for corn.

Plus, if you're on the highway, what do you see at this exit? A huge turquoise building with signs plastered over it like "live dancers," and "over 21 only." And like the strip club isn't bad enough, beside it is a small, quaint looking building... But in the front lawn, there is an enormous, bright yellow sign that can be seen from a mile or two away: "Adult Books And Videos!"

Oh yes, and it's also known nationally for a scandal that happened this year... Some kids broke into the high school's tech room and broadcasted a porn movie so that it came on televisions in every homeroom!

It's one of the 14 college towns in Pennsylvania, we could be known for a great college system, but nooo....

Corn and Porn.

-- Anonymous, June 13, 2000

Well, I'm not saying small towns are great (I really don't know how it's like in them), but at least small towns let people actually KNOW people...I live in CT, and they've been going nuts over the whole "You Belong in CT!" campaign the past year ( www.youbelonginct.com ) The whole thing is kind of a joke...we always laugh at who'd wanna be here if they didn't have to be? Everyone I know always wants to go out of state for college...I wasn't one of the lucky ones =P But then again, CT is considered one of the best states to get a job, because there ARE a lot, and you get paid higher than a lot of states, and there IS a ton of historic and cultural stuff around. I guess it's the old adage of the grass always being greener on the other side of the fence.

As for a specific controversy, there's been a lot of things around here where the head honchos have invested a lot of money and time into building and restoring stuff in the larger cities...only to have no one come. They just spent a few years and millions into redoing the riverfront in Hartford (I live in a city 15 min away), and I don't really know anyone who GOES there or anything. I guess it's because a lot of people just think of Hartford as ghetto-ey and unsafe, so they wouldn't be convinced by any changes. Seems like maybe they could invest the money into something more worthwhile.

-- Anonymous, June 16, 2000

My town always jokes about our "claim to fame" - remember the Mt. Prospect police car in the Blues Brothers? That's my town...yay!

-- Anonymous, June 20, 2000

Poquoson. (snicker, snicker) Yeah.

-- Anonymous, June 21, 2000

um. between the two bigger small towns here, oviedo and chuluota, there's like.. a mile long stretch of road called 'taintsville'. cause it t'aint oviedo and it t'aint chuluota.

no one things that's funny but me. but come on, 1) that's so trashy and 2) the taint is the place between your ass and your balls.

-- Anonymous, July 08, 2000