Y'know the kind I'm talking about? The movie that you absolutely love, but there is no verifiable reason or even a good rationalization you can use to justify it. I mean the kind of movie that causes people to look at you funny and then back slowly away while 'casually' searching for the nearest exit.

My own example is . . . My Chauffeur. A terrible movie. Awful. No redeeming qualities. I've watched it something like thirty times.

[Don't even get me started on Secret Shame Songs... ack!]

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

Answers

Well, I love The Wizard of Oz, but there's no shame there. People still look at me funny when I say that, but I don't care.

I love Heathers with Winona Ryder, Christian Slater and Shanned Doherty. That movie defined my teen angst years. I still love it.

But my ultimate secret shame movie is an old Belgian movie from sometime in the seventies. It's so old that the film turned green before it was transferred to video. The translation is bad, the video box is worse, and it's just terrible.

It's called Succubus: Sex Slave of the Devil.

It's soooooooo bad.

I love it.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

There are several. Married to the Mob. Penn and Teller Get Killed. Madonna: Truth or Dare. I think I'll stop there.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

Oh yes. Heathers. Yummy Christian. My own Slater favorite: Gleaming the Cube, although I can never remember if it's Gleaning or Gleaming, because I'm mildly stupid at times. Those were the *good* Slater years, before the horrors that go by the name of Very Bad Things and Basil. Watch. Mock. It's fun, really.

Anyway.

Secret shame: Camelot. The old and very cheesy musical version. I own it. It's lovely, for some reason that I can't quite grasp.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

"Just One of the Guys". Horrible, horrible mid-eighties teen comedy. Every time it comes on (which is about twice a day on Comedy Central), I just can't turn away. I will also always have a soft spot for "Revenge of the Nerds". I know I've seen it at least twenty times, but it still cracks me up. Plus, it's got Anthony Edwards with hair!

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

I've gotta go with "Godzilla vs Mothra".

Oh, and "Chances Are" with Cybill Shepard and Robert Downey Jr.

I think those are the two most embarrassing movies I own.
And I'll go ahead with the Secret Shame Song, because here at squishy it's not secret OR shameful...Without a doubt, it's that goddamn "Bye, Bye, Bye"

Hee.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

Both 'Romy and Micheles High School Reunion' and 'Dick.' But truth be told, neither is completely lacking in redeeming qualities. Still though, they're guilty pleasures.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

um, okay, 'waiting to exhale' [I watched this movie about 30+ times and I own it..I even had the lines memorised for awhile..hah] and 'don't be a menace to south central while drinking your juice in da hood' [I must say this is sorta funny...I mean, come on! haha...I don't own it but me and my friend rented it more than once just to watch the whipping head scene].

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

"Better Off Dead" -- I want my two dollars!!

"After Hours" -- I'll probably get blamed for THAT too.

"Spinal Tap" -- I, for one, do not think the problem was that the band was down. I think that the problem may have been that there was a Stonehenge monument on the stage that was in danger of being crushed by a dwarf.

"Barbarella" -- A good many dramatic situations begin with screaming.

"Forbidden Zone" -- What's a nice Jewish boy like you doing in the sixth dimension?

"Princess Bride" -- As you wish.

Most James Bond flicks are awful, but I get a kick out of them anyway.

"Cape Fear ('91 remake)" -- Grandaddy used to handle snakes in church, Granny drank strychnine. I guess you could say I had a leg up, genetically speaking.

"All of Me" -- Edwina. Backinbowl. Backinbowl!

"Big Lebowski" -- Nobody calls me Lebowski. You got the wrong guy. I'm the Dude, man. ... My...'*wife Bunny*'...? Do you see a wedding ring on my finger? Does this place look like I'm fucking married? The toilet seat's up, man!

"Clerks" -- You know, there's a million fine looking women in the world, dude. But they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you.

I think most of those are understandable except "Forbidden Zone". It's just freaky-weird. I don't LOVE it, but it's made me laugh.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

I own the movie Son-in-Law. I watch it regularly. I laugh. I quote. I even sing along with the square dancing song.

If I attempt to explain what it is that I love about this movie, I honestly can't do it and sound sane, so I won't even bother.

"Inbreeders."

"Middle America."

"Buff the wood!"

{Scurrying in shame.}

words diminish

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

That old Madonna movie, Who's That Girl...

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

I can't believe I'm going to admit this publicly, but I actually liked "Grease 2" when I first saw it. Don't panic; I eventually came to my senses. I'm pretty sure the only reason I liked it was because I had just finished playing Eugene the Nerd in a high school production of "Grease" which marks one of the most miserable periods of my adolescence and I was subconsciously rebelling against the original film. (I'm happy to report the situation was rectified and the bad high school memories erased 10 years later when I played Doody in another production of "Grease" that was and remains one of the best times of my life. I know, I know ... "every actor has a story about some magical summer show he or she was in.")

I still have the soundtrack to "Grease 2." Now I just revel in the badness of it all.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

Hey, don't knock Grease 2. It rocks, if only because of "Cool Rider".


-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

"Runaway Bride" A close friend of mine recommended this one to me. Yeah right. I walked past it at the video store for months before finally one night I just caved and rented it. I loved it, just like she said I would. I do think it has some very valuable elements to it, but try explaining that to some of my hardcore punk rock friends.

"Striptease" I was resistant to watching this one as well. This movie really has no redeeming qualities except for Demi Moore whom I am incredibly infatuated with.

"GI Jane" See above.

"You've Got Mail" --I can't help it!! Meg Ryan is too cute, and that ending with her character and Tom Hanks' character and his dog Brinkley in Central park...This movie just slays me.

"Little Buddha" Shut up.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

There's nothing wrong with "This Is Spinal Tap". On my scale from one to ten, it goes to eleven.

My guilty pleasure is The Poseidon Adventure, despite the sight of Shelly Winters climbing that Christmas tree and swimming through flooded corridors. I believe this movie was James Cameron's inspiration for Titanic - a sinking ship, a fat chick in peril, and a repulsive "love theme" song. Anyone remember (There's Got To Be) A Morning After?

My other choice: "Forbidden Planet", a cheesy 50's sci-fi flick loosely based on Shakespeare's "The Tempest". The fool! As if his ape's mind could contain the knowledge of the Krell!...

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

I think you guys have better taste than I do. I don't consider Princess Bride, the John Hughes movies, etc, to be "guilty" pleasures.

I'll watch absolutely anything with John Cusack in it. I even saw 'Pushing Tin' in the theater (yes, I'm one of the four people who did, and I think Angelina Jolie's brother bought the other three tickets), but I prefer to rent 'em so i can rewind and watch the boy in slo-mo for all the really cute parts, like the sad sad girl that I am.

However, My all time favorite guilty pleasure movie is Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death....best watched really late at night, preferably while altered in some way.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

"Chasing Amy " - Nuff said.

"Ten Things I Hate About You" - It's cheesy. It's about high school. It's not even all that funny. And yet, I keep watching it because I know somehow, somewhere, it was based on Shakespeare's Taming of the Shrew.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

Hey, Keri, my husband and I were the other 2 of the 4 people who actually saw "Pushing Tin"...and me mostly because of my man Cusack.

I have tons of guilty pleasures as far as movies go ("Dangerous Beauty," anyone?), but tonight the one that first springs to mind is "Tremors." I just can't resist it whenever it comes on cable. I may even have to buy it on DVD. Sad!

"Mission: Impossible 2" is my latest. Pure crap, but gleefully over- the-top crap, and I enjoyed every John Woo minute of it. (I've actually heard a couple of critics say it's the best "James Bond" movie to come out in years! Ha.) I think my husband loathed it, and I admit I laughed when I wasn't supposed to a lot of the time, but just couldn't believe what they were trying to pull. Granted, "Face/Off" was a much better Woo film, but if you're in the mood for lots of neat explosions, crashes, chases, and silly scenes of white doves flying through fire with Tom Cruise, it doesn't get much better than this.

-- Anonymous, May 26, 2000

PRINCESS BRIDE and SPINAL TAP are hardly to be ashamed of. (Boy, the grammar in that sentence sucked.) Both are wonderfully funny.

PB:
"Stop rhyming! And I mean it!"
"Anybody want a peanut?"

ST:
"He choked on vomit."
"We don't really know whose vomit it was. It's not like you can dust for fingerprints."

I also love ALL OF ME. Glad to know I'm not the only one.

My Secret Shame Movies are EARTH GIRLS ARE EASY and TRANSYLVANIA 6-5000, both of which I payed full price to see in the theatres for one reason and one reason only: Jeff Goldblum. I find him very yummy. While both movies are extraordinarily stupid, they're actually pretty fun to watch.

-- Anonymous, May 27, 2000

Mine would probably be Dementia 13, which was an early film by Francis Ford Coppola. By any objective standard it's a pretty average filmcheap ($22,000) knock-off of Psycho that he made for Roger Corman in 1963but I've always had a certain affection for it.

-- Anonymous, May 27, 2000

Lee & Glitterbeam,

I'll watch Grease 2 just to hear "Cool Rider." Not to mention Michelle Pfeiffer's dance number with that ladder. In fact, I just watched it last week, changing the channel from something more recent and better quality. I love when they do "Reproduction" -- a big dance number about pistals and stamen. The worst part is that I actually enjoy and sing along with that "Girl of All Seasons" song the Pink Ladies do for the talent show.

But why was Eugene still at Rydell when Grease 2 took place?

I also watched "Revenge of the Nerds" 4 or so. I think I saw this when it came out a couple of years ago. Just to make it cheesier, I think it was a TV movie. In this one, the head nerd is ashamed of being a nerd and yet the nerd house is cooler than the Alpha Beta. What the hell?

I'm a sucker for any '80s get laid movie, too -- the John Hughes movies are leaps and bounds ahead of these flicks in terms of class. What was with the older women? (My Tutor, Class, Weird Science)

As for shameful songs, I do find myself singing that damn "Bye Bye Bye." I had it drilled into my head for weeks, but even one listen will do it. I'd find myself singing along on the hold music. I'm so ashamed to be the person who got Pamie hooked on it. I meant it as a joke...now I feel like a pusher.

-- Anonymous, May 27, 2000

Threesome. I adore that movie. Stephen Baldwin's naked ass, OMG. Hell I've sat through Biodome to see his butt.

Happy Gilmore Totally stupid, love it.

Clueless Another stupid movie, I own, but deny it.

-- Anonymous, May 27, 2000

I have no shame. I love "Better Off Dead" and I'm not ashamed to admit it. I also love "Stayin Alive"--the sequel to Saturday Night Fever. This is a terrible movie, but I love John Travolta so much that I have seen it hundreds of times. Half the soundtrack is done by Frank Stallone and the other half by the Bee Gees, and (turning beet red) I know most of the words. I think "Grease 2" is a great movie, and believe it or not, I liked it a tiny bit better than the original. I'm not sure why, since Travolta was in the original, maybe its the whole bowling/"We're Gonna Score Tonight" scene. I love it! Also, "Breakin" and "Breakin 2-Electric Boogaloo"--bad break dancing movies from the 80s. Oh, I just realized that these are so much worse than anything anyone has already posted. I'll shut up now, before I embarrass myself any further.

-- Anonymous, May 27, 2000

Friday, Popeye (a favourite since I was a toddler), Don't Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood and Afros and Bellbottoms, a Sinbad HBO special. I know Sinbad is a punchline in and of himself, but the whole routine about the chocolate spray inexpicably cracks my shit up.

-- Anonymous, May 27, 2000

Erica and Glitterbeam,

OK, I'll concede that Michelle Pfeiffer singing "Cool Rider" is worth watching in "Grease 2." Of course, it could have been an hour and a half of her just sitting there and I would have been happy.

-- Anonymous, May 27, 2000

"Clash of the Titans"

In 1981, the summer my family got cable, this movie was on HBO continually. The Medusa scene still scares the shit out of me.

-- Anonymous, May 27, 2000

Ten Things I Hate About You is my guilty pleasure, too! For two reasons: A) Julia Stiles is just the cutest grouchy rebel girl EVER, and B) I saw it for the first time in a drive-in theatre, which makes ANY movie good as far as I'm concerned.

-- Anonymous, May 28, 2000

I'm very much not ashamed to admit loving The Princess Bride. I love the Back to the Future movies (especially the first and second ones), as well as Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. Also, I'm not exactly embarrassed to admit this, but most people don't get it unless they've watched them, and that is muppet movies, The Great Muppet Caper in particular, which is one of the funniest movies I've ever seen.

(I like "Bye Bye Bye" too. Oh the horror.)

-- Anonymous, May 28, 2000

OMG.. I can't believe I am admitting this..

Buffy the Vampire Slayer - The Movie.

There is something about Pee-Wee herman dying at the end and the overexageratted "Ooh.. eek.. ahhh.. umph.." when he dies that just makes that movie so cool :) hahah

Not to mention the fact that Luke Perry is in it, and when it came out he was actually decent looking :)

Michelle Gellar doesn't have anything on Kristi Swanson :)

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2000

The Great Muppet Caper rocked!

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2000

Grease -- I've memorized this movie. Every word, every song, the whole damn thing.

Armageddon -- I own, it, I cry BUCKETS every time, and two more words: Ben. Affleck.

Goonies, The Breakfast Club -- I'm a sucker for cheesy 80s movies, like the movies shown on Comedy Central every 5 minutes. PCU is another that comes to mind, but that was in the 90s

My new guilty pleasure song, that just won out over "Bye Bye Bye" is

Oops... I did it Again. -- I'm so ashamed of myself..

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2000

Oh.My.God., Casey!!!

I thought I was the only person ever to see Clash of the Titans. I'v seen it hundreds of times, probably. I remember being so scandalized by the woman bathing in the shell.

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2000

Ten Things I Hate About You must have some kind of addictive ora -- my roommates and I rented it one night, watched it, then watched it twice the next day. Then my roommate bought it. And we've watched it many times since. Heh!

My favorite Christian Slater movie, to go with that (from pretty much the top of this string), is Untamed Heart. It's cheesy as anything, but I ADORE it. I'm NOT ashamed! Even though my roommate makes fun of it (and me) all the time. It's great, I tell you, great.

And I agree -- nothing wrong with loving The Princess Bride. That's a GREAT movie.

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2000

Woohoo Jon, you rule :)

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2000

The Pirate Movie.

Horribly cheesy early 80's updated version of The Pirates of Penzance with some of the original Gilbert and Sullivan songs as well as horrid 80's type love ballads thrown in, starring Kristy McNichol and Christopher Atkins. It's APPALLING.

I love it.

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2000

Alison & Casey,

Clash of the Titans is one of my favorite movies ever! I don't think of it as cheesy, which probably tells a lot about me. I love when Danai's town (Curses! can't remember the name) is being destroyed. Someone's toga blows up, revealing late '70s/early '80s style green short shorts with yellow piping. I think that was the summer we got HBO, too, because I've seen it a zillion times.

Speaking of secret shames, my mom is pretending to watch Law & Order, but switching to the Britney Spears Disney special and staying on the Brit special longer. I'm still trying to cleanse the bad teeny bop "artists" out of my system. I feel somehow responsible for all that crap being everywhere and I feel oh so dirty.

-- Anonymous, May 29, 2000

1. Evil Dead (although many of my friends love this too) 2. The Abominable Dr. Phibes and the Return of (no one seems to even know these and explaining them is pointless) I was able to buy these but they are edited because I clearly remember things that are not on these tapes. I don't understand why videos for sale would be edited as if they were for network television ? 3. The Omega Man (I actually paid $40 for this way back when it was a special order).

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2000

John! I loved My Chauffeur! However, I believe it does have a redeeming quality--and her name is Deborah Foreman. I haven't seen it in years, mainly because the last time I tried to make someone watch it with me I never heard the end of it. Giving a dog alka seltzer for a hangover is just plain funny. I don't know why no one else thinks so...

I am mighty fond of Roadside Prophets with John Doe (X) and Adam Horowitz (Beastie Boys.) Awesome John Cusack cameo. I think it's a brilliant movie and I maintain that the acting is stilted on purpose. Not to mention the cute-boy factor. I've managed to convert a few people into fans. Rent it! Bonus cameos by sixties icons.

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2000

I would love for someone to explain what it is about Princess Bride that makes people watch it over and over. Especialy theatre people. At the Banff Centre's theatre school the movie was played everynight and during the day sometimes, with most watchers reciting the dialog along. I like the movie but not to the point of needing specialized medical attention.

Then again I could watch anything with Jennifer Connely in it at any time and few of them have any redeeming qualitys.

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2000

ever since the first time i saw it "saint elmo's fire" has been my all-time favorite movie. i love all the brat pack movies. i know, i need help.

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2000

I will have to hang my head in shame over this one.

It's a touching little movie called "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Heart's Club Band" which has so many things wrong with it on so many levels it is the very blooming onion of cheesiness.
Consider, if you will:
George Burns sings the classic "Fixin' a Hole", which is not only the worst and most blatent of all the drug based songs the Beatles ever did, Mr. Burns dances to it with two child actors of the "adorable moppet" type, and compounds this by doing the ol' soft-shoe, badly, along with it.
When "Heartland U.S.A." is threatened by the bad guys, who do they get to help them? Superman? Captain America? No! They call the Bee Gees and Peter Frampton, from England and Austrailia, for rescue.
The fist fight at the end....hmmmmm, let's see now, the BeeGees and Peter Frampton in a bare knuckled brawl versus Aerosmith....hmmmmm, four (BGs & PF) against five (Aero)....hmmmmm, wussies versus people who regularly destroy hotel rooms for fun....and the BeeGees and Peter Frampton WIN?????? HOW in the LIVING HELL did THIS happen??????

I've probably seen it about twenty times. I'm looking for a copy on DVD. The shame, the shame...

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2000

I can't believe I'm the first to say Eddie and the Cruisers! Words and music, man.

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2000

Army of Darkness. That movie just rocks. It was one of the first DVD's that I bought. It makes no sense, it has the CHEEEEEESIEEEST lines ("Give me some sugar, baby!") and some of the worst acting ever put on screen, but it makes me laugh like nothing else can. Matter of fact, I think I'll go watch it....

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2000

I absolutely adore "Dream a Little Dream" with both the Corey's... You know Corey Feldman and Corey Haim. I just think it's so funny and I crack up at every statement out of Digger's mouth (Corey Haim's character). Does anyone else know what I mean? I've never even met anyone who's even heard of it or seen it...

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2000

Pretty Woman. It's so dumb, but i like it.

-- Anonymous, May 30, 2000

i know every line alicia silverstone says in "clueless".

i dance around the house to "grease".

and i can't get enough of "empire records".

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

Yes, I too have seen and 'like' Dream a Little Dream.... (ashamed to say so but i do... )

Other guilty pleasure movies.... Romy and Michelle's, Sixteen Candles, Sesame Street from the Metropolitan Museum of Art (this is an OLD SCHOOL PBS special people--i found a copy of it on VHS and prize it like gold...) what else?... I love Clash of the Titans too--nothing wrong with that.. While you Were Sleeping.. must I go on???

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

Guilty pleasures that are not really guilty 'cause they're kind of cult: The Princess Bride, Clash of the Titans, John Hughes movies (and numerous other cheesy '80s movies), Dream a Little Dream (and The Lost Boys, while we're on the subject of the two Coreys)...the list undoubtedly goes on.

Obscure guilty pleasure: Krull. Has anyone ever seen this movie? I was so into it as a kid - I even had a Krull card game.

The truly evil guilty pleasure that I can't even believe I'm admitting to: Top Gun.

Hanging her head in shame...

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

I saw Clash of the Titans at the drive-in's during the summer of '81. I just turned 14, and I thought Harry Hamlin was such a hunk!

My secret shame movie? The Incredible Mr. Limpet, starring Don Knotts as a fish-loving nerd who gets his wish ... and saves the American way of life from the bad guys. I taped it off the tv with my little tape recorder, and could quote dialog from the movie verbatim.

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

'The Secret of my Success' with Michael J. Fox and Helen Slater. The ultimate feel good movie, and I should know. It helped me make it through my divorce.

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

I will watch any movie with the Muppets in it. Jim Henson still rules.

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

How about "Real Genius" -- the Deborah Foreman fans should like her brief appearance there (Can you drive a nail through a 2x4 with your penis? - No. - well, a girl's gotta have her standards.)

Up the Creek (Animal House meets white water rafting -- with the world's smartest dog)

Top Secret - spy movie spoof made by the guys responsible for Airplane and the Naked Gun - starring a VERY young Val Kilmer (who sings and dances)

Adventures in Babysitting ("Nobody leaves until they sing the Blues")

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

"The Wedding Singer" - Totally cheesy, and pretty lame I guess, but I grew up in the 80's and well, I totally dug the movie, and well, bought the video and have watched it at least 25 times.

"Somewhere in Time" - with Christopher Reeve and Jane Seymour. Totally sappy. Totally romantic. Totally a tear-jerker. I still cry when I watch it.

"Logan's Run" - I still think that movie rocks.

"Some Kind of Wonderful" - with Eric Stoltz, Lea Thompson and whats her name. Cheesy, but I love it!

Oh, there's more, but I will spare you!

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

Oh yeah -- I almost forgot -- "Deep Rising" - kinda like "Tremors" (another favorite) on the high seas.

and touching the remote while any Die Hard movie is on should be considered a capital offense (offence?)

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

Army of Darkness is definitely toward the top of my list. I don't think the acting was bad at all, contrary to some other opinions, though.

However, possibly my favorite movie of all time (and only a guilty pleasure in others' eyes) is the 1978 classic (I did say 'classic') "Halloween." Donald Pleasance and Jamie Lee Curtis stalking and being stalked, respectively, the most dangerous villain to ever hit the big screen. What a time.

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

Wow, y'all are so reminding me of movies I used to love.

Melissa - I, too, loved THE PIRATE MOVIE. I even had a teeny 3 week crush on the guy who played the Pirate King (though he's not even in the same league as Kevin Kline).

Hyndla - What could possibly beat Steve Martin singing "Maxwell's Silver Hammer"? Aside from Steve Martin singing "You'll Be a Dentist" in the musical version of LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS, that is.

LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS - I have a few issues with this movie, especially the horrible revised ending, but up until "Mean Green Mother from Outer Space" I still love to watch it. But I can't watch the original Roger Corman film, much as I love his Poe "adaptations". Actually, I just watch them because of Vincent Price.

I used to love GREASE 2, too. I saw that before I saw GREASE, strange as it may seem, and I knew every word of every song.

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

How about Steve Martin singing, "I'm picking out a thermos for you.."

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

Leigh Anne - what is that from? I don't think I'm familiar with that. *hangs head in shame*

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

May I ask how Chasing Amy made it on a list of secret shame movies?

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

It's from "The Jerk." It's a classic if you haven't seen it. Starts out with him narrating: "I was born a poor, black child." Hee!

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

I have an absolute love/hate relationship with Dirty Dancing, it's an all time favorite, and I watch it all the time, but it's one of those "you gotta be in the mood for" movies. Biggest shamefull movie.. Can't buy me love. It's an eighties flick with a happy ending, and some really weird fashion problems.. what more can you ask for???

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

Word up, Howie! I looooove Real Genius. I can watch it over and over. Not just because the lead kid is so great (what happened to him?) and the whole thing is kind of cute, but because Val Kilmer was such a hottie. Yeah, I know he's reputed to be a spoiled diva in real life, but a girl can dream.

My other big favourite of that era is the very first Madonna movie, Desperately Seeking Susan. She's certainly not the big draw for me here- I loved Rosanna Arquette's performance, and the kicky design vibe, and the whole thing just makes me wanna dye my hair great colours and dance all night.

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

Okay, somebody already mentioned LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS and DIRTY DANCING.

But I think my other guilty pleasure movie is so lame, nobody in the world could love it but me:

AMAZING GRACE AND CHUCK.

Yes, I'm a sap.

Alex English, Jamie Lee Curtis, and a host of has-been athletes (including Harvey Martin, former Dallas Cowboy -- go Cowboys!) and Gregory Peck as the president of the United States. I love that movie.

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

I know you all love this next one but were to ashamed to own up. "COOL AS ICE". This is the best movie of all times! I still have a friend who pounds on the top of my door and then says "I'm looking for cat." I love love love this movie! And "lost boys" and "gooneys" (how the hell do you spell that?) By the way, if anyone will own up to owning cool as ice, I will buy it. No really I will. Please- I'm desperate!

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

OK, here it is, the only action movie Geena Davis ever did. The Long Kiss Goodnight I luv luv luv luv it. I wanted to be her for the next 36 hours. Oh, so good.
And...
Queen Margot
Tron
Oh, get this...(moves hand over "Eject" button as she knows she is about to be shot down)I don't like Clerks! I was bored to death!
Great Topic, Pamie. Oh, and my brother is moving to Austin, from San Diego, and you're moving to LA from Austin. Wow. Well, just wait till you're performing at Luna Park!

-- Anonymous, May 31, 2000

Hey, no argument from me, Andrea - I didn't see what was so great about Clerks, either.

As for my personal Secret Shame movies, I see your Empire Records and raise you Spaceballs and Half Baked. Stupid, yes, but I've seen them probably fifteen times each and laugh till it hurts every single time.

-- Anonymous, June 01, 2000

It's Tremors. The original one (not II) with Kevin Bacon and Michael Gross. It's so campy. But I love it.

-- Anonymous, June 01, 2000

Gah! I hate it when I can't think of a movie title...

Okay, the most embarassing secret shame movie I could come up with is the one with Riki Lake and Craig Sheffer. She is a make-up artist in a funeral home, in love with Craig the subway train driver with a skinny girlfriend, and she takes all her money and vacation time to try to win him over? What was that?!?!?! Babycakes? Yeah, I think that may have been it.

Anyway, I will watch it any time it comes on. I don't know what it is I like about that movie so much - maybe her cute apartment and colorful outfits. Maybe it's her giggle. Or her innocence. I don't know, but I really root for Riki every time I watch it.

The other one has to be Valley Girl. I was so hot for Nicholas Cage then. And I'm afraid that I can relate to some of the outfits. I'm not admitting anything for sure, but I just MIGHT have worn some of those clothes in high school. The soundtrack rules too.

-- Anonymous, June 01, 2000

Clerks? Chasing Amy? How can these films be "guilty pleasures." I adore Kevin Smith, I love Kevin Smith....I will sing from the tree tops that I even adore Mallrats and Dogma (the worst of his 4 films...only redeeming merits--I get to stare at Ben Affleck for 2 hours and Alanis Morrisette as God...some sort of twisted irony there). Put Jay and Silent Bob (Kevin Smith) on a screen and I will laugh until I cry or wet myself (not literally, I do know how to control my bladder!). Need I go on---because I will if I haven't yet fully described my love for Kevin Smith...

Now a true guilty pleasure---"Girls Just Want to Have Fun"---Helen Hunt and Shannon Doherty (spelling) as Catholic school girls competing for a role on Dance TV! Yes I own it. Yes I still watch it. No I am not 14. Yes I am ashamed!

HA!

-- Anonymous, June 01, 2000

Ok - I don't remember what year it was, but for one month all HBO seemed to show were Grease 2 and The Pirate Movie. It was the first summer my town had cable, and I was addicted to both of them. From the first, there's the bomb shelter scene ("Get any other war wounds?"). From the second, one of the best lines I've ever heard ("This is my dream and it'll end the way I want it to"). I still love these movies -- I think my name is the only one that appears on the rental history for both at my local Blockbuster.

Other guilty pleasures include anything shot in period costume, and even more so if John Malkovitch is in it. Someday, I'll figure out my insane lust over that guy . . .

-- Anonymous, June 01, 2000

Alot of my favorite movies are on these shame lists: Evil Dead and Army of Darkness and Tremors aren't really shameful - they are great campy flicks though!

I loved Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Heart's Club Band. I have the soundtrack. My husband threatened to divorce me over it until I pointed out that I bought it when I was 13 and he owns a Garth Brooks CD that he got as an adult ;>

Pirate Movie rocks because Kevin Kline is so great in it. Real Genius is one of my all time faves.

I have something that may be the most shameful of all: Spice World. No, don't laugh too hard, it's got cameos by Meat Loaf, Elivs Costello, Joanna Lumley (from Ab-Fab), and it has Richard E. Grant and Roger Moore playing a Blofeld-like character who has a baby piglet instead of a cat. The movie is horrible but there are so many in jokes with the cameos that it's too funny.

And I can't believe there aren't any Steve Gutenberg movies on here. How can you forget that ode to the 70s, Can't Stop the Music. With Steve, Valerie Perrine and the Village People!!! It's an abomination and I watch it every time I see it in the TV listings.

-- Anonymous, June 01, 2000

My best friend's dad was in CAN'T STOP THE MUSIC, I'm sorry to say. He was the ventriloquist who auditioned, I think. He was also in AMERICATHON, the only episode of Police Squad that didn't air and was the ventriloqual (sp?) technical advisor for 1941, one of the few Spielberg films to flop. Though he's a fantastic ventriloquist, he's not very good luck.

SPACEBALLS - *sigh* I lost my virginity shortly after watching that movie. (I told the story Pamie's "Losing It" thread.)

Nitpick time: Kevin Kline was in THE PIRATES OF PENZANCE, with Linda Ronstadt, Rex Smith and Angela Lansbury (and you're right, he was fabulous - that was the first time I'd ever seen him and I fell fast in lust). THE PIRATE MOIVE was with Kristy MacNichol and Christopher Atkins and, as Melissa said, was appalling. Yet compellingly fun, in its own way. I think I also started watching it, along with GREASE 2 on HBO one summer, when they played three times a day. Or so it seemed.

-- Anonymous, June 01, 2000

o0o I forgot one. Rocky Horror Picture Show!! :)

"Let's do the time warp again!"

-- Anonymous, June 01, 2000

Susanne: OMG, I haven't seen Sesame Street in the Metropolitan Museum of Art in soooo long. Don't eat the pictures, no no no. hehe, I'd so be making you copy your tape if I lived near ;)

Props to Leigh Anne for being a fellow muppet fan and for quoting The Jerk. "I'm a cosmotologist." "What's weightlessness like?"

-- Anonymous, June 01, 2000

I loved The Jerk. I almost spit out my diet coke when i read the line "i'm picking out a thermos for you". that movie makes me pee i laugh so hard. I am also a fan of PeeWee's Big Adventure thanks to my cousin i had to babysit. His facial expressions are too damn funny. I also wanted to be a girl for all seasons so i could reherse with Maxwell Caufield in Grease2. I OWN Starship Troupers for the line " they're scared" uttered so eloquantly by the doogster. I must say though, everytime Just One Of The Guys plays on Comedy Central i end up hanging out at home to watch it. i am SUCH a dork.

Caitlyn

-- Anonymous, June 01, 2000

The Net. Yes, the Sandra Bullock movie. And I cried when they cancelled the TV show. (If I ever write a book and for some reason they make a movie out of it, Brooke Langton is going to be in it whether she's sixty by then or not. She's my Personal Shame heroine.)

I'd beg you not to think any less of me, but I guess that ship has sailed.

Oh, and "Bye, Bye, Bye"? Yeah, I do the dancey-wavey thing to that one, too.

-- Anonymous, June 02, 2000

jamie, caitlyn, et. al:

It's these cans! He's mad at these cans!"

Anyone who loves The Jerk is a damn good person as far as I'm concerned.

-- Anonymous, June 02, 2000

My favorite part of The Jerk is when he receives the phone book with his name in it--

"I AM somebody!" and "You can't BUY publicity like this!"

Heeheheheee! Remembering scenes from The Jerk has made my morning much better! Thanks to all!

-- Anonymous, June 02, 2000

oh god..I have so many of these that i've seen time and time again and never tire of.....here goes... "Reality Bites" I know every line pretty much and a friend of mine and I recit them during drinking games as a category "Clueless" "Back to the Future 1, 2, and 3" "Never Been Kissed" "Ten things I hate about you" "dirty DAncing" Cocktail Pretty Woman Grease Breakfast Club 16 Candles American Pie My Girl 2 Camp Nowhere There ya go..laugh.

-- Anonymous, June 04, 2000

Good grief, Monica. 15 open tags? :o)

-- Anonymous, June 19, 2000