I have to ask. What do you think of this whole letter business?

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Answers

To tell you the truth, it pisses me off just thinking about it! I mean personally it was none of their business. I would feel completely and totally violated at something like this.

Anways, I hope everything eventually works out

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Apparently, somebody has nothing better to do than stick their nose in someone else's personal business. Fucking bastard. It's beyond ridiculous.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

That sucks. That person may have been trying to help, but I think they went about it all wrong.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I can understand being concerned, but what the letter writer did was uncalled for. It's sad and does piss me off as well. Maybe the person thought that she/he was helping, but it didn't. I'd be totally upset about the whole thing, and while I don't suggest you do this, I'd probably shut down the whole site. It's pretty sad too that you had to erase basically the whole site for one person's "concerns." People should really think hard before they act...

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I think it's a lot of crap. I used to have an on-line journal which I kept for a year. I stopped keeping it because people just start getting creepy. You'll get someone who thinks they know the whole story just because they read along with your entries. Like an on-line diarist could possibly write about every little thought in his or her head. There will always be people who think they know everything and what's best for a complete stranger. Those people are just annoying and screwed up.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Yes, I deleted my journal way back in 1997 because of the same reason. However, if I was in your circumstances, I'd definitely feel violated and all but I'd probably move and not delete an entire life of substance no one else knows about. I really wish you hadn't deleted the whole thing. Anyway, no regrets right now. The person just knows what's happened now and will feel guilty and the very least.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

That's just aevil. I've read journals where the author has had to delete his/her archives or move them or password protect the lot because their Dad found it or something, but that's their own look- out: the Internet is a public medium, where anyone can read anything. But to interfere like that, betray your trust, if you will, after you've put so much work into this journal [stop being soppy, Zed] is horrible.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

It's exactly this sort of thing that demonstrates the bad side of the internet. While it's nice to think there are private corners online etc etc, this just isn't so. I'm really sorry this happened, for what it's worth.

The letter writer is at best a misguided person and at worst a complete and utter arsehole. Either way, they went about it the wrong way.

My advice - learn about .htaccess and .htpasswd files for user authentication. Even this isn't completely secure. And it bites because the rest of us won't get to read any more (unless we email and request accounts or something...).

People suck. But you knew that already, right? :)

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

It was shitty. It changes things for you, they should have minded their own damn business.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

That's really, absolutely awfully horrible. It's a sick thing to do. Sure, I can understand how you might be concerned about you Katie, but they don't KNOW you. It's really not a very nice thing to do.

I think Crystal said it all when she said 'violated'. I suppose that's why now I'm feeling a bit apprehensive about putting certain personal details on the Internet, I'd be absolutely so goddamn pissed off if something like that happened.

And Katie sweets, I'm sorry you had to delete your archives. That's really sad that you had to do that =( I hope that person dies a nasty death from spiderbites or something. They shall perish in flames.

*HUGGIES* It'll be alright honey bunch.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

That seriously blows. Here you let us share part of your life and someone goes spewing out the details. It makes me really sad that someone has been reading along with us and instead of cheering you when you started feeling better, they kick you in the teeth. I just don't understand how anyone that's been reading you for more than a day could do something like this. I'm so sorry that they did this to you, Katie. I hope you don't think we're all a bunch of assholes now, too. =(

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I think it sucks. When I was reading your journal, I was glad you had this for a release, a place to go and vent. Now they have taken that from you. Keep writing even if you don't post them to your site. oh, and happy graduation!! (close enough!)

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Wow. Way too fucked up. That's just triffling. If they were really concerned about you, they should have contacted, oh, say, YOU! WTF?

Any ideas as to who it is? If they're over here on my side of the country I'll beat 'em up :)

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

That4s so typical. You trust somebody - they don4t understand you. It4s a pity to lose your archives but do remember that those entries affected positively sooo many readers every time that there4s no way you can say it4s like they never existed, right? And I4m sure I4m not the only one you gave the inspiration to start an own journal... if that4s of any consolation :-

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

My GOD, that's horrible. I can't imagine anyone doing that. I now use an alias on the internet and have my journal at a secret URL (that is, it's secret from offline friends) because of some problems I had with friends last year. But the one thing I'd never have thought of worrying about was readers. I mean, you think that readers are on your side, right?? And I don't buy ANY of that whole 'they were concerned' thing. Bottom line is, it was none of their goddamn business to interfere.

I'm really sorry this has happened, Katie, especially since I was only halfway through catching up on your archives, but I understand why you've done what you've done.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

That really is sad.. I've wondered what I would do if something like that happened, and when it comes down to it, I'd be forced to discontinue the journal. I'd throw it on a disk and put it away, and delete it from the servers. It would just be over.

Sorry to hear about that Katie... that person had no right to do something like that.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

The letter author sounds like your local busy body. Every small town has one. They go out of their way sticking their nose into things they barely understand in the hopes of becoming the village hero, at least to their friends and immediate family. They don't actually do anything potentially useful like go to school board meetings or talk to people but prefer to write letters from the shelter of their homes where they sit back and think they've accomplished something.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Ugh. I hate it when journal readers think they know a journal *writer*'s life better the writer herself does! I'm really sorry this had to happen to you, Katie. I'll miss the archives (though if you wanted to put them back up, you could always do the password protecting thing). I wish people better understood the boundary between writer and reader when it comes to online journals.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I'm shocked and disgusted to read this thing about the letter. Who hasn't talked about (thought about) suicide at some point in their lives!? While I was concerned about your low moods, it NEVER entered my mind that you were seriously going to do something like that. Depression comes in waves all through our lives and we ride them the best we can. I was so thrilled when you decided to finally open up to us in your journal and now you've been betrayed. It breaks my heart that you deleted two years of writing. I feel fortunate to have read most of it.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

This is terrible news. I think anything I could possibly say has already been said. Do you have a secret backup of the archives, or are they gone forever? I'd hate it if this happened to me, but at least I keep paper copies of my journal to hold on to.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

When I read your entry it really pissed me off. Who on Earth thinks its their right to be so "concerned" about you that they had to tell your school your thoughts and feelings in order to "help you" somehow. It's fucking screwed up. And because of this person's stupidity, now you have to delete all of your entries, all of your past life experiences. And now you're dad is going to be all paranoid and on your ass all the time about how you're feeling and whatnot. I guess privacy isn't an issue with some people....whatever.

+++Meg

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

That's complete BS Katie. No one, no one has the right to invade your privacy like that, especially someone who doesn't even know you in real life. It's sad to know that someone took all this trouble to make trouble for you. They wrote your SCHOOL?! Ugh. All this pisses me off.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

The jackass. If I were you I'd be two steps from burning things down. Not only did they get you in deep crap but they also made you destroy two years worth of good journal. they had no right doing that. Tsk tsk... people should get their heads out of their asses and do their OWN stuff and butt out of your life.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

It's nice to want to help... but, that was a bit insane. Obviously the letter writer has never felt the same way you have before. To me, the way you wrote about the suicide, I could basically tell you didn't mean it... You pretty much made a joke about it and never really SAID you were going to do it. You said it was at certain times that you felt like doing something like that. Hasn't anyone else? I think that, at some extent, it's normal to be like that... Is it normal to feel happy all the time? No. Is it normal to feel sad all the time? Of course not. But, there are times where you just feel like you're in the dumps and never coming out. I don't know.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I think it is COMPLETELY unfair. First of all, this person had no right to stage some near-intervention just because they read some of your journal. Everyone gets depressed and has a right to share those feelings if they want to. I think that it's horrible you had to take down a whole mess of stuff because of one stupid (and i mean stupid) person. Okay that's enough for now... good luck with this.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I'm shocked. Somehow you never quite expect people to go that far, to "violate" your offline life as well as your on.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

The same thing happened to me last year, only the letter was sent to my parents instead of my school. I can totally understand your point of view, seeing as how I deleted all my archives as well. I hope things get resolved soon for you. I think it's a huge privacy violation, but it's something you just gotta live with... *sigh*

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

i think that is seriously fucked up. I'm thinking it was someone who knows you right? I mean how did they get the address to your school. I however am that pessimistic so i would have believed such a thing would happen. What i don't understand is why someone would do that. and i get what you mean about feeling like those years never happened. It was especially messed up for this individual to take your words out of context.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I'm so sorry this happened . . . God, that's unbelievable. A letter to your school. I think the worst thing about that is the fact that this letter-writer carried it over to a THIRD party. Rather than trying to contact you, or trying to contact your parents (which still would have been over the line), he/she sent it to your school. And, of course, school officials are obliged by law (I think) to investigate students' emotional well-being and security. So where this could have been a matter for you to deal with, or for your family to deal with, there are suddenly teachers and administrators involved.

This just shows utter lack of respect.

I understand someone being concerned for you. Any journaler should assume that readers will develop feelings of friendship and concern, simply by reading the details of your life. And if you were making true threats, I would only hope that readers would be insightful enough to take some sort of action. But no journaler should have to worry about something like *this* happening.

I think that maybe that's why this has generated so much response. I know that it worries *me* a little. You forget that you're vulnerable, sometimes, when you communicate blindly and at a distance.

I suspect that the letter-writer wasn't simply doing this out of concern. Anyone truly concerned would know from your journal exactly how difficult it was for you to try to talk about depression with your parents and teacher. Anyone truly concerned would have thought it through enough to express that concern in the most unobtrusive way possible.

I hope this works out for you, Katie.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

geez...I guess ya never think it can happen to you. that someone would be so inconsiderate as to do something like that! it made me sad to read the letter story. deleting all those archives for one stupid person.

:::sigh:::

well, I hope things work out and nothing bad comes of this. I miss the archives ::sniff::

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

they must die. period.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I think that whoever sent it needs to shoot himself in the head, seriously. That happened to me as well, except for it was my sister who found my webpage and etc, etc. I wish you didn't have to delete your archives, but I understand.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

I already replied above, but Katie, I have to ask.

Who wrote it?

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

I already e-mailed you but I was in a sort of spastic mood about all the other things at that time. Anyway, I think it's really ignorant that people try that kind of shit. It's happened to other people many times too and it's bs! You mix that w/ any other "bad" thing and you could be committed! I had ODed, and then they took tons my internet stuff and filed a mental hygiene on me. And that was just in March of this year!! People are sooo screwed up. Writing helps us and they don't see that. Ugh.. I'm just disgusted. Katie, girl, I hope you don't feel the need to like censor everything you write from now on because you're not the one who is fuckt up. It's whoever did that. That person really needs to get their on life. Rock on girlie. And just Look how many many people got your back. =)

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Hopefully whoever sent the letter did so with good intentions. If the intentions were the least bit impure, wow - people can be awful sometimes. I hope nothing too terrible comes out of this. A few headaches and a bit of anger at the very most. Anything more and I'm going over to your house to give you a hug.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

i started my journal because of you. i don't think this person was in any way trying to be helpful, and i'm very sorry that it happened. i've been reading your journal for a while now but i would never even think of doing something like that. it's a complete violation of everything you've worked for. it almost makes me happy that my page is hardly ever visited, because i wouldn't want people i know to read the things i say and realize that it's the truth. things said online don't always apply to real life. people should know that. i'm so glad that you're not going to stop, because i seriously check this site almost every day, and i would be very sorry to see it go.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

[Me again :)] So, it wasn't done out of concern? Did they do it as revenge or something? WTF... someone obviously has no life, ya know? People can be so dumb.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Firstly Katie, I have to commend you on how well you responded to the whole incident. That you didn't break under pressure. I think the person was being quite a little "busy boddy" and had absolutely NO RIGHT butting into -your- personal business. I agree it's the past, and that what it always is. Five minutes ago was the past, right now is the present. I just find it unbelieveable that this person had the audasity to write a letter to you're school. Gawd I feel like smacking that person.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

I know I'm just echoing everybody else, but I'm so sorry that this happened to you, Katie. There's no way you deserve it; it's a horrible situation and I really admire you for making the best of it. Just don't let this idiot stop your writing - I'd love to keep reading! Good luck :)

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

*looking at the silver lining* at least if means frequent updates :p */looking at the silver lining*

again, so sorry this happened.

-- Anonymous, May 05, 2000

Is there any way of tracking down who did this? Probably, but I'm really not up on all that, so I wouldn't know how to go about it. Like everyone else, I naturally think it was a heinous thing for someone to do -- after all, if they were actually concerned for you, they could've emailed YOU first. The only suggestion is that you keep your stuff up, but take down your "personal info" that would make something like this possible...i.e., your last name, your school name, your town, whatever. It's kind of sad that you'd have to do that, but all it takes is one person, one incident...I hope things work out for you.

-- Anonymous, May 05, 2000

I just had an idea.. If you know who did this, and they're an Internet person, you could give us their e-mail address and stuff and let us take care of them. Even if we JUST bitch them out, it'll make them think about how stupid they are because there's a lot of us who think you rock, Katie. A LOT. Anyway... Later....

-- Anonymous, May 05, 2000

I agree with what Heather just said. Of course, if that person reads Katie's journal, she/he is most probably reading this message board. If so, I would just like to tell them that what they did was complete asinine. Moreso because it wasn't out of concern. If you have a problem with Katie, there are more mature ways of handling that. For you to take it upon yourself to inform Katie's teachers of this site and all it's contents with quotes, was so fucked up in the brain. If you have a web site, how would you like it if someone did the same thing to you?

Katie, I'm glad that you really haven't let this complete moron phase you too much. I'm also glad that you are continuing to keep your journal. Too bad all the archives are gone, but thank god I've read them all.

-- Anonymous, May 05, 2000

I found out about this at another website. So I came here to find out what was going on.

I think what that person did was totally wrong, immature, and just plain foolish. I have kept an online journal for just over three months and have had an offline one for almost nine years. I know if someone I knew read either of those and told someone about it, I would feel violated (as one of the people here put it).

You know, if you wanted to keep your online journal going, you could always move it, and those of us who wanted the new address could simply e-mail you and ask.

All I'm going to advise you to do is this. If you want to move and not give out your new address, do that. If you want to give up the online journal thing altogether, do that. Whatever you decide to do, I'm sure everyone here will support your decision. You're handling this very well. :)

S.

-- Anonymous, May 05, 2000

Katie, I've been reading you for a while, and I understand how helpful and/or healing it can be to express emotions to perfect strangers who seem to care about you. I'm sorry about what happened, and insanely curious to know who it was that fucked you over. Please know that there are some of us who care enough not to try to "help" you. :)

-- Anonymous, May 06, 2000

I loath people who have no concern for the extensiveness of journals, and privacy of the individual. I had my journal "exposed" per se about four times, hence the moving of my website to many servers. I was very hurt when these jerks (I agree, yes, jerks) tossed it about in conversation towards me as stupid.

Katie, I feel horrible just thinking about what a debacle this has been for you. I'm not trying to bring you down, only trying to make the best of what has happened. I know that my opinion or pity will not glaze over your feelings now, but I hope that you know I _respect_ you.

-- Anonymous, May 06, 2000

Katie, you're right. That pretty much was an immature idea. I'm 16 though. I'm allowed to be immature. =) I'm glad it all is sort of settling down for you. =)

-- Anonymous, May 06, 2000

Rather than reprinting the journal entry I've written about it here, I shall point you in the direction of I Wasn't Built to Get Up at this Time, or if you are reading this after the 6/7 May, go straight to the entry.

And a few of you who have posted here have been namechecked for your ridiculous (how on earth do you spell that?) views... it's only fair to say!

-- Anonymous, May 06, 2000

Um, hi. I've just explained my ridiculous views in your forum, Tim dear. (sorry about not explaining them here in the first place, i was really pissed off when I wrote my message here)

-- Anonymous, May 07, 2000

I think that you were betrayed, Katie. I think that ALL on-line journalists should feel betrayed. I think ALL readers of on-line journals should feel betrayed. I feel betrayed. Please journalists protect yourselves but PLEASE, PLEASE keep writing. PLEASE do NOT allow a small percentage to have the power to stop your beauty. This new art form is the greatest thing since the printing press.

-- Anonymous, June 16, 2000

The letter writer was a meddling asshole.

-- Anonymous, August 06, 2000