What bugs you that you know you shouldn't let get to you? (Besides the grammar in that sentence, I mean.) What drives you nuts? Do you go ahead and get angry, or are you saving it all up so that some day you can become a mass murdering psychopath?

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Answers

I work with computers. All of my co-workers and I like to work in natural light because it is easier on our eyes. (vs. natural light *AND* the flourescent (sp?) lights.)

There is a project manager who comes in each day and turns on OUR lights! They don't affect her, but she turns them on each day. We have a whole battle going on over the silly light switch at work.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

When I say something that's unbelieveable or remarkable, and Dan answers with, "Whaaaatttttt?"

Don't ask me why, but that just bugs the crap out of me. So I bug him back by repeating exactly what I had just said. And every time, he says, "I didn't mean I didn't hear you, I meant that I didn't believe what you said!" and I say, "well, when someone says 'what?' that means repeat."

Wow, annoying each other is a fun game, isn't it!

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Without wishing to come across as the least tolerant person on the train, it's people who sit near me making a constant low-level noise. For example: breathing. Yes, other people's breathing annoys me. As does jangling change in pockets, clicking, tapping, sniffing... the list goes on. As soon as I've identified the noise and the noise-maker I am oblivious to everything else and just sit flinching with every offence, and hopinghopinghoping they'll stop (because how do you ask someone to stop breathing so loudly?).

My other bug-bear is apostrophes in the wrong place. Grrrrrrrrr. I suppose my idea of hell would be spending eternity in a restaurant surrounded by mildly noisy people and wildly-apostrophed blackboards? b

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

I loathe people who take up my space on the tube - the buggers who insist on reading their newspaper with it opened wide and held half over me, or the women who sit down next to me with their bag tucked to one side, so their bag ends up on my knee. I respond by viciously shoving the offending item back in their direction, while maintaining my best blank London Commuter expression.

Speaking of other things transport-wise that drive me to drink - the people who ignore the 'please stand on the right' signs by the tube escalators. These people are always tourists. If you were to survey 200 random Londoners I promise you they'd all rank this as one of the most annoying things ever.

Also, Tristan gets on my wick when we're stuck in traffic and he gets all grumpy about it, despite the fact we're in absolutely no hurry to get anywhere. He's all 'but it's annoying' and I'm all 'but you're getting nowhere by being grumpy, aside from bringing us both down' (I'm such a little ray of sunshine).

And the way he leaves dirty dishes in the living room, despite having to walk past the kitchen to get to anywhere else in the flat. Grrrr.

Oh - and anybody on the tube who pretends to ignore the 80 year old woman and not offer her a seat, particularly when the person sitting down is a 20 year old man.

Right, on that note I'm off to do battle on the Circle line. Oh yay.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

People who meander down a busy sidewalk at a snails pace. Somehow these people always manage to end up directly in front of me, flanking the sidewalk in such a way that I am trapped.

When I spot an obstruction of this sort, my reaction will be directly related to my mood.

If I'm happy and feeling good I will figure out a way to maneuver around them and breeze past with a dirty look.

If I'm having a bad day I will get right behind them and yell "excuse me" until they get the fuck out of my way.

Slow walkers are a menace.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

People who don't know the basics of how to use their dang computers. I can understand if people who aren't technical don't know how to map to a new printer, or install software, or edit their autoexec.bat, but for christ's sake, learn how to point and click! Learn that the right mouse button does things now. Learn where the Explorer lives, and how to use it.

People in California who complain about their weather. Too nice? Boo effing hoo. IT SNOWED HERE YESTERDAY!

Once I showed up for a job and the project manager had something on his white board which I thought was terrific: a shopping list like this:

Rifle ammo boonie hat cooler beer ice Forget-the-dog-beware-of-owner t-shirt Map of downtown with clock towers circled.

Anytime somebody pissed him off, he'd add something to the list.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

I cringe at the sound of someone clipping their fingernails at work. I can just imagine bits of fingernail all over their cubicle. I understand how uncomfortable/annoying it can be to type when your fingernails are too long, but geez... use a file!

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

My other one: when I discover embarrassingly bad grammatical errors on the front page of this site while I'm at work and have no way to fix them. Ick.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Thanks, Bea -- glad I'm not the only person who sees apostrophes sprinkled in signs everywhere I look. I once saw a sign shop with a large sign posted on their front door: SIGN'S PRINTED HERE. Uh, no thanks. My driving peeve is slow drivers in the left lane. I don't care if you're doing 110 mph, if somebody's passing you on the right, you need to move the fuck over. The left lane is for passing, damn it. (I know, I've spent entirely too much time on the highway.)

When I lived in DC, I used to just charge through tourists who stood on the left side of the Metro escalators, calling gaily, "Walk on the left, stand to the right! Thanks!)

Don't get in MY way, Kate ...really, I'm not rude, just busy...

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

People with bad teeth. Not sure why and yes, I do know that it is not necessarily their fault; but coffee stained, smoke smelling, pointy incisors, overcrowded, maloccluded, gap whistling, full of fillings, plaque breeding teeth just bug me! (However, now that I've told you guys I probably won't go out and murder anyone on my way to the periodondist/orthodontist.)

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Bugs me ? Not enrages me ?

The riffling of fingernails tapping on a hard surface, why ? Damfino.

Being hard of hearing, though with a hearing aid, those who know me and know that a hearing aid does not bring hearing up to the level of a ten year old, who persist trying to talk to me with their back turned to me, or talk to me from the closet or pantry they are in.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

People who get in my way - those slow walkers mentioned above. People who block the whole damn aisle at the market with their carts while they stand there gazing at the shelf. gaze all you want, just let me the hell by, okay??

Similar thing with pokey drivers - when you turn you don't really have to slow to 5 mph. Honest.

The people at the laundromat last night who were using about 15 dryers, I kid you not. So I was unable to get three dryers together in the area where I like them. Of course I had to remind myself that in the old neighborhood, I was happy to get any three dryers and not have to wait. These people also had a small, bored child with them who whined and ran around as they stood there folding and folding and folding. Jeeze, I just want to get the hell out of there.

also, the lady who used the dryers below mine and parked her plastic baskets there so that when I took my laundry out, a few socks & things fell into her baskets. We were both nice about it, but still, I would have preferred an unimpeeded path to my stuff.

finally, the harridan sitting outside smoking whose cigarette smoke I had to breath for a milisecond. then she added insult to injury by telling me she liked my dress (in her rasping, cigaratte voice).

I get over these things by going home and telling my spouse about them in a humorous way, which makes the whole thing seem absurd.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Stand on the right, walk/pass on the left gets to me too! I'm not bold enough to announce it, but in my passive/aggressive way (see psych thread) will stand behind someone and clear my throat. Lately though, I've been able to calm down about it and either detour to take the stairs or just relax--I'm going to work, how much of a hurry can I really be in.

I'm surprised no one has mentioned cell phone talkers. It drives me nuts, especially on the train, to have people near me talking on the phone. Usually they're speaking even louder than they would be if the other people stood right there next to them. My train line has even started a cell-phone politeness campaign!

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

I get annoyed with myself when I'm on a different computer than my own, using IE, and post on the Xeney forums. Since switching to Netscape on my laptop I've gotten out of the habit of sticking in lines of to-be- truncated periods.

Sometimes our minor annoyances come to a happy end. I have a PO box (number 27365, Seattle, 98125 -- send me stuff, I'm not proud), and it used to be that when I received something too big to fit in it, the postal person would stick a slip of paper with my item number on it in there, and I'd have to go wait in line with the mouth-breathers. Look, if you want to send something Priority Mail, or insured, or with a receipt, you need to fill out a form. The forms are on a tall desk that the line curls around. You cannot avoid seeing these forms while you are waiting in line. And while I'm at it, I cannot believe that anyone could make it to late adulthood without knowing that you cannot seal a package with Scotch tape or masking tape and still have it sent through the mails.

Anyway, the PO instituted a new system involving bus-station-style lockers. Now when I have a package, I find a key with a number on it in my box. I match the key to the appropriate locker, open the locker, and inside is a box with my name on it. Not only does this obviate the need to wait in line, it also gives me this ridiculously rewarding successful-treasure-hunt feeling.

Another mail-related experience that made me happy yesterday: I needed to return an item to Amazon.com, and I remembered that I had about two tons of their rickrack shredded paper packing crap left over from Christmas. (Anyone who received anything from Amazon knows what I'm talking about here. It gets everywhere.) I gleefully stuffed as much rickrack as the box would allow around the item; I had to hold the box shut with one hand while I tape-gunned it with the other. Back whence you came! I knew I was saving that shit for a reason.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

the INSERT key.

I hate it.

Hate it.

Hate it.

I'm always accidentally hitting it when I go for the delete key with my pinky. I type over important things and have to go back and retype them. That just annoys me!

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Roommates who don't do their dishes. Then when you go to do the dishes act all apologetic and tell you they will help. Then disappear. Then when you try to talk to them about it they get all defensive.

In fact, anyone who gets really defensive when you try to bring up a simple problem bugs me, especially when they try to make *you* look like the bad guy for "not having brought it up earlier," no matter how early you are bringing it up.

Can you tell I am still pissed off at my ex-roomate?

I had a dream last night that he moved into my new house without asking and I drowned him in the sink. I think I need help.

Other pet peeves - women who insist on being called women but refer to men as "boys". Women in general who walk around with the idea that all men are idiots, all men are desperate, all men are creepy (yet will still take free beer from said men).

Can you tell I just spent the weekend with my friend who goes to an all-girls school, which seems to breed this type of sexist garbage?

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Okay - I've thought of two more....

I work on one of two side by side, 31 story glass buildings. In between is a fountain and a park type area. The problem. The freaking smokers ruin it! You can't walk out the door without being slammed with a huge cloud of smoke and it stays with you...

Wait 3 things! Those same people who get on the elevator with me after their smoke break. Smokers should have a separate elevator.

Okay 4 - smokers who smoke in a restaurant. Yick! Even in non- smoking, the smoke from your cigarette drifts over to me and kills my whole appetite! Can't you wait till you get out the door!

Finally - parents who have their young children in Wal-Mart in the middle of the night. I get even madder when said children are crying. WAL-MART @ 1 A.M. IS NO PLACE FOR YOUR CHILD! Get a sitter, get a grip, and get thee home to put that baby to sleep you idiot!

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Incorrect use of the conditional clause really irks me. For example: "If you feel like calling me later, my extension is 321." Your extension will be the same regardless of whether or not the person you're talking to feels like calling you. "If you're looking for coffee, that's on aisle twelve." "If your sink keeps backing up, I know a good plumber." Arrrgh.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Yes, I have to agree about the insert key. I guess it must be useful for people who enter data into pre-set forms all day, but since I never do that, it's nothing but a nuisance. I wish there was a disable function for that button somewhere.

It also irks me that the "Caps Lock" function is a keyboard function while all of the other font-changing functions are in the word processing software. I keep forgetting that I have to unlock the caps. Instead I just move the cursor out of the block of text that I want capitalized, only to discover that the caps have followed me to the new text. It's annoying.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Small children making big noises in confined spaces such as buses or libraries where you can't avoid hearing them. That usually manages to aggravate me. An annoyance which really makes me irrational, however, is the social security department. I'm saving up my hatred of them for a big blowout one day in the near future when I burn my local Centrelink office down with all the workers inside.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Jackie Collins: I'm there with you on your irritability over inconsiderate people on the Tube, and the idiots who, for some reason, never notice the 'Please stand to the right' signs that are placed side by side, in fours, about every two feet on your way up or down the escalators (though I kinda think they only put so many signs on that space between the up and down escalators so that stupid kids won't use that area as a slide).

I find myself increasingly irritated by American and Canadian tourists who feel the need to announce their presence in very loud, grating voices. When my cousin (not someone I'm particularly enamoured of anyway -- basically, she needed a tourist guide and I was convenient) was visiting me from NYC, she did this. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die, basically.

People who pronounce 'Newquay' as 'New-KWAY' instead of 'NEW-key' -- even AFTER I correct them (hello, cousin Michelle!) get on my tits.

And if I catch my boyfriend using Yahoo! to conduct searches, I lose my shit. He actually has to get up and guide me away from the PC ('It's okay, Ian will make the bad web page go away') as I rant at him. He has no IDEA how angry it makes me.

I think just writing this has tripled my blood pressure.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

The phone ringing. It rings constantly around here, mostly people calling for my absentee roommate. But lately (since we all got sick of telemarketers and no longer answer the phone much) all we get are constant, constant hangups! We got fourteen in a DAY, for godsake. From nine a.m. to ten-thirty p.m., it's RINGING RINGING RINGING. Now I'm resentful of even those who leave messages for calling here and forcing me to hear the ringing again.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2000

Most phones have a switch that allows you to turn off the ringer. Also, called ID is great for screening those unwanted calls.

-- Anonymous, April 14, 2000

Geez Dave...always gotta be the smart ass, huh? :o) Oooo, caller ID? WoW, I've NEVER heard of that. *chuckle*

And the next target for Dave's patented flamethrower is...

-- Anonymous, April 14, 2000

Here are my FORUM pet peeves (I think they qualify as irrational, because if they're so upsetting to me, I really ought to stop reading fora):

1. People who don't read the other posts in the forum and say something that's already been said.

2. People who attempt to "debate" by repeating the same points over and over again with slightly different wording.

3. People who dismiss anyone else's arguments as "stupid" or who use other personally insulting terms. My absolute least favorite forum phrase: "you'd have to be stupid to think that (fill in the blank)." There are plenty of ways to say that you disagree with someone without name-calling and personal attacks.

4. Anyone who thinks that there are simple answers to controversial issues. If something is controversial, then there are probably good points to be made on either side of the argument. Diminishing the controversy makes a person appear either arrogant, or not fully informed about the issue.

-- Anonymous, April 14, 2000

Jen Wade - - How do I love you ? Let me count the ways. You have common sense, courtesy, intelligence and wisdom. That is just for starters. Why did you qualify your entry as irrational - - - - - ? ? ? ? ?

-- Anonymous, April 14, 2000

Jennifer Wade - you've spoken for all of us here, I suspect. If I could just add 'people who embark on pointless points-scoring missions against fellow posters, to the boredom of everyone else' I'd be happy.

Jackie Danicki - I'm so excited to hear I'm not the only London-based reader of this forum that I almost can't think straight. How about people who walk ten abreast up Oxford Street? Or the shop assistants in any high street shop in London? Or what laughingly passes for service in a typical London restaurant? Or how sour the staff in the supermarkets are? I could go on all day.

-- Anonymous, April 14, 2000

oooh, I forgot one: people who chew with their mouth open.

-- Anonymous, April 14, 2000

Humans who don't know how to merge into traffic. Humans who (1) own mini-vans, oversize pick-ups, or SUVs and who (2) feel that size gives them the right to hammer their way through traffic and run *over* any smaller cars... No one who isn't a participant in the Paris-Dakar road rally or exploring Chile for fossils or working as a forest ranger has any acceptable reason for buying an SUV. Mini-vans remind me of soccers moms-- team sports and children, two of my *least* favorite things. Pick-ups... Well, like Camaros, the socially loathsome factor is obvious.

Then I could go on about... lines at the Post Office, the genetic defectives prowling Wal-Mart, and the assumption that *everyone* likes cheese on hamburgers...

-- Anonymous, April 14, 2000

Any resting facial expression featuring a slack jaw and an open mouth. I want to stride over and wire the person's jaw closed and seal their lips. Similarly, shuffling not because you're shuffling but because you're too damn lazy to pick your whole foot off the ground with each step. To me it indicates that life is just too much effort to bother. So please die already and stop bothering me.

Anyone taking the elevator to the lobby from the second floor. People (mostly men) sitting wide-legged on the bus, taking up two seats to accommodate their tremedous members, and giving me the hairy eyeball when I say "excuse me, I'd like to sit down." Anyone making fun of someone whose accented English is hard to understand: I ask such people just how their Chinese or Russian or Hindi is doing these days, and can they speak those languages as well as this person speaks English?

The latter two aren't irrational, sorry, but I have a hard time seeing anything that disturbs my universe as minor.

Oh! People saying "liberry" instead of "library." Omitting the first r in February or the second t in twenty. Certain southern accents. "Is there any questions?" and similar disagreements (I heard that yesterday from someone from Arkansas, though it's a national problem).

-- Anonymous, April 14, 2000

Yes. Thank you, Jen Wade.

I have one to add: people who think it's just terribly cool or funny to go around a *work place* (and a liberal one, at that) mimicking Chinese accents, or stereotypical gay voices. Since the work place in question has no Asian people and no gays or lesbians, I guess it's supposed to be okay. (No one mimics African Americans or Latinos, because both of those groups are represented in the office.)

It's not funny. It's not okay. Jesus, it's not even mature. I could just kick someone right now ...

-- Anonymous, April 14, 2000

Jackie Collins, I don't live in London (Brum, sadly), but I am there more than is good for my sanity; I love it, but after about a week I start to freak. I could make a whole list of irrational London annoyances. Let me see:

The way the air on the Tube makes my snot dirty (yeah, I look at the Kleenex after I blow).

The fact that all-day Zone 1-4 Tube tickets aren't good until after 9.30am and I have to be at Heathrow to meet someone at 9am.

Guys in Leicester Square who run up to you and smack your ass, TWICE (happened to my best friend last summer when we were just standing here after getting out of a club, talking to some American guy). I know that hanging out in Leicester Square at 2am isn't exactly a wholesome experience, but I don't think it warrants a spanking from a total stranger.

People (tourists, usually) who walk 10 abreast down ANY sidewalk (good one, Jackie Collins). I avoid Oxford Street like the black fucking plague for just this reason, but I've been unable to escape it on any London street.

London minicab drivers who think that, just because I speak with an American accent, I don't know that a taxi from West Cromwell Road to Earl's Court should not come to #40. And when they act as if they're doing me a huge favour by 'letting' me walk away after having paid 1/10th of that, that pisses me off, too.

I seriously need to stop this, because I'm going down there in a few days and I want to look forward to it...

-- Anonymous, April 14, 2000

Noise, noise & noise. Ungrateful children who view me as their maid. Children who, rather than empty the trash, stuff the can so full you can't get the bag out. Children who leave dirty dishes & empty snack containers scattered around the house. Children who are, currently either at the movies or sleeping. Thank you, God.

-- Anonymous, April 15, 2000

People who engage me in conversation just to list off their petty annoyances drive me nuts. I don't mean this forum (obviously) but instead those people who, when you ask how they are, start in with a litany of complaint about lack of parking, or their bad hair day, or how they couldn't get a seat on the bus, or how their room mate drank all of their milk. And they always seem to start by sighing, deeply, and saying what a truly horrific day they are having.

And I want to grab their lapels, and shake them and say a horrific and bad day is when you pick up the phone and find out a parent died, or your child. A horrific day is watching your house burn down with your dog inside of it. A horrific day is waking up in an ICU unit with a priest standing over you, shaking his head sadly. If you are ambulatory, and not in much pain, and none of the above has happened, you are NOT having a bad day. You are, instead, a big whiner. Shut Up. Shut Up. Shut. Up.

Speaking of shutting up, all of those people, those awful people who are always telling me about their migraines, and ulcers, and the like need a good slap. It isn't a migraine, it is a headache, ok? If it were a migraine you would be underneath your desk, rolled in the fetal position, sucking your thumb and praying for a quick death to relieve the pain, not perched on the edge of my desk, asking me for an aspirin. And it isn't an ulcer every time your stomach hurts, either.

Oh, and my biggest annoyance of all time - when people ask me where I got something. I wouldn't mind if they asked because, say, they really liked my new glasswear with the bees on them and they wanted to get some themselves and need to know what shop to go to. I mean the ones who ask because they have some sort of twisted ranking system, and if I said an object came from Pottery Barn they would like it more than if I said I got it at the KMart. It has nothing to do with admiring the object itself, just the store it may have come from. Usually these types won't weigh in with whether or not they like the object until its place of purchase has been established.

Oh, and people who sigh, and then don't say anything after that.

-- Anonymous, April 16, 2000

Ooh, Kristin, you reminded me of an acquaintance of mine who always used to ask me, whenever I or my boyfriend acquired something, how much we had paid for it. The house, his car, my new sweater -- "How much was that?" It drove me crazy because I was raised to believe that inquiries regarding income and spending habits were NEVER to be raised. This rule was so absolute that I had never had to come up with any kind of rejoinder, so, on the spot, I'd usually just tell her. I have never been able to learn how to politely say "None of your business," to anyone, so nosy people bother me inordinately. I mean, I used to actually explain to people why I wasn't married when they would ask, then hate myself for expostulating on a topic that was OH SO CLEARLY none of their business.

The "used to ask" in the first sentence isn't because she's stopped doing it, it's just that I no longer see her several times a week and I no longer have shiny new things for her to ask about when our paths do cross. (She, however, got a new BMW this month. Not that I am bitter; I'm sure it was a disappointment to her after her husband forbade her from purchasing the Ferrari she REALLY wanted.)

-- Anonymous, April 16, 2000

When someone says my name to get my attention, and when I say "What?" or indicate they have my attention, they pause, gathering their thoughts. I contend they should have gathered their thoughts BEFORE they got my attention. I've been known to snap "Spill it!" at my husband. It's a pet peeve I developed during childhood when my mother would be recounting one story or another during dinner, and would pause to take a bite of salad or whatever. I believe the proper form is to TELL THE FREAKIN' STORY and THEN eat, damnit!

http://www.bitchypoo.com/bitchypoo.html

-- Anonymous, April 16, 2000

so far I have agreed with everything everyones said. now that either means that I am VERY irrational or that we are all saner than we thought. a couple for me. 1. water up my sleeves. dont ask me - just ikyiky feeling. shudder! 2. people who pronounce medicine "medcine" 3. smokers in front of open doors. so they go outside and the smoke goes in? especially at my local university there is a big sign saying "do not smoke here- the airconditioning air intake is above you" and where do they smoke? 4. parents who take their kids to a resturant and let them run everywhere and make noise, tease people and play with loud toys while the parents just say "oh don't do that dear!" and often these children are about 8!! they should learn to sit at a table politely by then! 5. Parents who call their kids stupid. I saw a lady who started up her stroller a bit fast and her 3 year old spilled her drink (just water) at which the lady started screaming at the poor girl how stupid she was and useless.

ok more than a couple...

-- Anonymous, April 16, 2000

When some of my boyfriend's relatives -- many of whom would otherwise never call him -- phone up to ask him for help with their PCs, keeping him from his supper or anything else he may have been doing before they called, without ever asking whether or not he was free to take over an hour out of his precious spare time to give them gratis tech support. This burns my butt (as my Dad would say) to no end, ESPECIALLY as they never, EVER express one iota of gratitude. This is made even worse by the fact that they are all the living definition of the term 'novice,' and have to be instructed on how to even click a mouse properly, yet have no qualms whatsoever about ringing and asking Ian if he could walk them through (even though it's more like a crawl across broken glass) how to configure modems, edit the BIOS and all kinds of crazy shit. If they can't get us on one of the land lines, they phone my mobile phone. It's gotten to the point where I'll sometimes say that I'm out and I'll let Ian know they phoned when I get home at 11pm or some other late hour. The other day, one of them called just as I was serving him his special birthday dinner, which went cold, even though he told them that I'd made him a special meal and that it was going cold.

But that's more of a justified annoyance than an irrational one.

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

Kim, I was also raised with the idea that one never asks what anything cost, and am amazed at just how rude some people can be. My mother's star technique for dealing with these people is to very politely ask them why they want to know. If you do it sounding curious and would-be helpful they'll have to think of some reason. If they're thinking of buying similar themselve you can direct them back to the shop. I always say I can't remember/it was a gift.

New annoyance for today - people who walk past my desk at work while I'm practically striking sparks off my keyboard I'm so busy, and get uppity because I don't stop what I'm doing and yarn with them for 5 minutes.

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

Apples. Yeah, I know they're good for you, and that we all should eat them on a regular basis. I do. In private. But I honestly think there should be a law against eating apples in public. That 'scrunchsplosh' sound every time someone takes a bite makes my stomach turn. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go outside and have a smoke.....

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

People who hate smokers annoy me. I can understand hating someone who blows smoke in your face. But when you hate people who smoke outside (the only place they're allowed to smoke now), or hate them AFTER they smoke, or hate them even if they're in the non-smoking area of a restaurant -- well, that bugs me. I have never smoked, but many of my friends are smokers. Frankly, I like being with smokers because I enjoy seeing someone enjoying themselves. I also enjoy being with politically incorrect people. I'm not denying the health risks here, just denying that it's necessary to be completely intolerant of something you don't do, or approve of, yourself.

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

Girls who pee on the seat. They drive me INSANE. Presumably they're hovering over the seat to keep from coming in contact with other people's germs, but you'd think that anyone who was that worried about hygiene would be considerate enough not to leave her bodily fluids behind for the next girl.

The worst part is that they're always gone by the time I get there (obviously), so there's nobody to yell at.

(And I'm sure it's bad when boys do it too, but I don't have to share bathrooms with any of them.)

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

There's a woman in my office who calls me "kiddo" or "kid." I find it insulting and have told her so, but she keeps on doing it. I haven't been a kid for a long time, and she's not that much older than I am. One of these days I am going to come out with "What, you old bat," in response, and then where will I be?

The UPS driver who won't leave packages without a delivery signature. It's a little thing, I know, but I want my stuff without having to bust a gut to get home before he arrives. Hello? Most of us do have to work for a living.

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

Junk e-mail drives me crazy. That person who keeps calling our house and then just breathing into the phone when we answer. (Not heavy breathing or anything amusing like that, just breathing.) Men who sit on the subway with their legs wide open so they're all rubbing against me. (somebody mentioned that already, I know.)

More than anything, though, I am annoyed by this: I have worked in the same place for over two years. There's a woman who comes in regularly who ALWAYS tells me how much I look like a friend of hers who died a few years ago. The first few times she told me, it was okay -- a little weird, but okay. But she comes in three or four times a week, and every single time, she reminds me that I look like her dead friend! It's creepy! She's brought in pictures, and other than hair color, I look nothing at all like her friend. Nothing. But every single time, it's "Youy look just like my friend Betsy. "You look just like my friend Betsy." "You look just like my friend Betsy..." SHUT UP!!! I get the screaming creeps every time I see her now, but I can't avoid her. Agh!

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

My one annoyance that I could think of without ripping off someone else's:

People who do that quote thingy in the air when they talk. You know what I mean. Two fingers of each hand done "that" way...

Yeah, then I go and do it myself. Sheesh.

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

Today in particular, I'm incredibly peevish with co-workers who play the passive/aggressive thing. They want to "help" but in the process of helping, I end up having to drop what I'm doing 85 times to answer a question about what goes where, who does what, and why this has to be entered this way. ARGH! I'll do it myself!

Can you tell it's payroll day?

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

Kim Rollins, I feel your pain: not only am I uncomfortable with people asking me how much cash I dropped on anything, I'm mortified when people volunteer that information on their own, e.g. "I love my new cashmere sweater. It was $200 at Nordstrom's," or use price as a sure-fire indicator of something's inherent superiority, as in "I passed on getting the Saturn; I'm getting the Mercedes SUV for $45K instead."

Oh, and saying "K" in lieu of "thousand" when you're talking dollars only compounds the irritation. -------------------------------------------------------------------

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

Or how about when you're shopping with somebody and they don't know whether or not they like something for sure until they see the price tag? That cracks me up every time I see my, er, this person I often shop with doing it.

Or how about people that care which store something came from? "Roots" shirts suddenly lost all their appeal when they started selling them at Wal-Mart.

-- Anonymous, April 17, 2000

men who follow me. I mean follow me around while I do my shopping, try following me home (although they never get there, I'm getting good at avoiding them now) I had one ask to buy my underwear once! actually, men who think that I am gratified by "whohoo baby show us your ass" I dont mind the guys who look at me and smile, or give a nice wave, or even if they say something as long as it isn't something to the tune of god my dick is huge dont you just want me? anything starting with "hey baby" is a no no!

-- Anonymous, April 18, 2000

People who insist on spelling the word definitely, definately! I'm constantly amazed when I'm looking at people's web pages, or I'm on a BB, and see that word spelled incorrectly over and over and over...

-- Anonymous, April 19, 2000

Jennie: I once posted a similar complaint on a BB and was told, by some dumb man, that I should enjoy my looks "while they last" because when I was old I was really going to miss all that attention.

Incidentally, I don't think either of us are irrational for wanting to crack heads together at this kind of attitude.

-- Anonymous, April 19, 2000

Bad table manners make me nuts. Today at lunch, I was forced to sit across the table from a woman that pulled/dragged the fork over clenched teeth after every bite. Stab the food, wave it around, put it in her mouth, then s-l-o-w-l-y drag the empty fork out of her mouth. It was agonizing to watch. It was worse to listen to the screech of metal against teeth.

-- Anonymous, April 19, 2000

I must have a real hair trigger, because I'm agreeing with most of the posts!

I'll add a few further down my list: at work, they spend thousands of dollars on many glossy brochures for the United Way drive (plus the kick off meeting for two hours with coffee and donuts for 1000+). If they'd just donate all that money, they'd be halfway to the total!

Groups of two or three walking down the sidewalk, who won't move an inch for on person (me!) going the other direction. You don't get to have the whole sidewalk!

Tiny little peeve: the subjunctive. It's "What if God WERE one of us...."

People (men) who know lots about music and think every song on the radio is a little quiz ("who sang this? who's the guitarist?"). Don't know, don't care.

Sigh.

-- Anonymous, April 19, 2000

Okay, now I'm getting anal. I'm not sure if it's really the subjunctive, and I'm also not sure if it's really supposed to be "...if God were...". So if I'm right....man, that really bugs me. And if I'm all confused.....never mind, and feel free to push past me on the sidewalk.

-- Anonymous, April 19, 2000

Nah, you're right. The subjunctive is always used with a conditional clause. Of course, as I was whining above, few know the proper use of the conditional clause.

-- Anonymous, April 19, 2000