Yes, I know Pamie already did this topic. I'm a big old thief. Tell away.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

Answers

When I entered Mar and my last name it gave me "Half-Cut Skeleton".

Which I kinda like, but when I entered my real first name and last name, I became "Spunky Misunderstood Genius".

Not as cool, but far more appropriate.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

I turned out to be "Well-liked Assman" which is rather interesting to say the least. My partner turned out to be "Homicidal Terrahawk." So I should be a happy proctologist and he a killer bird.

Hmmmm...

Michael of The Road Trip

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

Method seems to vary names, but maybe not so much "Tha 23 Buchan." ( what is a Buchan ? What story ? ) does refer to soldier though.

"Erratic Assassin." Where is the erraticity ? quantity ? quality ? Status of victim ? Time of day event occurred ?

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

"My Cousin the Wife Beatah"

Oy.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

As Vic Kipper, I get back "Detective Ventriloquist."

With my birth certificate name I get the one I keep: "Monolithic Fishmonger-X."

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

Well, using "Beth Susan" I got "Superintendent God-Botherer " which was kind of cool, but this is much better, using my full name -- "Elizabeth Susan":

"Gorky's Zygotic Glove Puppet"

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

I came out to be Vangelic Surgeon. I don't know what to say about that, but my girlfriend came out with Big Gay Mule which makes me giggle

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

My Wu name is Dependable Skeleton.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

Bwah! And even better if I use my last name:

"Alarmingly-Named Wolfman"

bwa ha ha ha!

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

I was all happy about being Monolithic Fishmonger-X until I read that somebody else is claiming to be Monolithic Fishmonger-X also. Pah. I CHALLENGE the fake MFX to a battle to the death with a too-tight lycra bodysuit and a passel of overdone theatrical gestures!

Woo me.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

As David Grenier I am: Partially-Formed Transformah
As Dave Grenier I am: Flippant She-Creature I also looked up the names of a bunch of the old IWW organizers, to find out who they would be if Wu-Tang was around back then...
Masta Cow - Joe Hill
Slumbering Pierrot - Big Bill Haywood
Crafty Barnardo - Elizabeth Gurley Flynn
International Cow - Mother Jones
Tha Ever So Weary Assistant - Emma Goldman
Big Wicker Ventriloquist - Carlo Tresca
Inscrutable Drama Queen - T-Bone Slim
Spunky Misunderstood Genius - Joe Ettor

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

I am 100-Watt-Warlock or Womanly Panther, depending on name combination.

Either will do.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

Hmmm... so I seem to be Flailing Fantical Killer

Sounds appropriate to me... :)

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

I'm the Gratuitous F-REEK. Hmmm.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

"Tha Prickly Comedian"???

This sounds like either a villian from Batman or some weird hyena-porcupine hybrid. Or Don Rickles.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

As Carol Elaine Cyr, I am Lesbian Pimp. As Carol Cyr, I am Monolithic Fishmonger-X. I think the two together sound divine: The Lesbian Pimp Formerly Known As Monolithic Fishmonger-X.

I guess this means I need to build my stable of fish-eating lesbian hookers, all working as a single unit while fighting for the rights of lesbian hookers everywhere.

Lesbian Hookers, Unite!

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

The last time I did this I typed in the name of my best friend's dad and it came back with Big Wicker Ventriloquist. Considering he's been a professional ventriloquist for over 35 years, it's quite fitting.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

Hee hee hee!

Just as Kate: Auxiliary Priest

With my whole name: Illegitimate Muslim Fundamentalist

Well, that me laugh out loud. I choose IMF. Cool, no?

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

I'd personally like to give mine back--Tha Winged Cow

Although I often feel like a cow (like when trying to squeeze in and out of the backseat of our car), I don't think I'd want to proclaim that fact quite so loudly.

If I just use my first name and middle initial (I don't have a real middle name, honest!), I get Dubious Maturbatah-X. Maybe DMX Cow?

I tried my hubby's name--Victorian Cow. Our last names don't match either!!! His is better when I just use his first and middle names-- Childish Gambino!

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

As Philip Flores: Detective Ventriloquist As Philip Jose: Alarmingly-Named Wolfman As Jose Flores: Big Wicker Ventriloquist As Philip Jose Flores: Astmatic Enemy of God As PJ Flores: Inebriated Assistant

I think I'll go with Detective Ventriloquist.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

I am Bilious Bad Janitah, and depending on if I put Jim or James my SO is Violent Toilet Thing or Ol' Filthy Sweaty Bastard. Our kids are Officer Stinkah and Spunky Misunderstood Genious. Ouch.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

I am none other than Womanly Panther. My girlfriend, depending on how you enter her name, is either Sheepish Lord of Chaos or The Lesbian Pimp.

I like mine a great deal.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

lesbian pimp.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

hey, Dana, I'm also Tha Prickly Comedian. Though I think it would be the perfect name for The Mighty Kymm!

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

I'm the Promiscuous Protestah. Apparently.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

I am the Optimistic Lyricist (like Britney Spears?)
My husband is My Cousin the Wife Beater (complete with Mullet)
My daughter-in-utero is Chocolatey Shatner.... not looking forward to changing her diapers!

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2000

Did this before, but it's still funny!

With my full name (Katrina Marie _____) I got "Curly-Haired Slacker." Scary, I have naturally curly hair and I am the WORST procrastinator I know.

With just my shortened name, I got "Vangelic Surgeon," which I just don't get.

I'd like to know how the do that, I mean, what kind of system it uses...

-- Anonymous, March 23, 2000

Alright, frankly I'm not all that impressed with Dependable Skeleton. It's really not even close. I invented tardiness and I'm actually quite rubinesque if you ask my DH.

So I too tried several variations...and achieved much better results. I kept trying until I got it just right. I have schizo tendencies I guess...

First name/married surname: Spunky Misunderstood Genius (eh!) Middle name/maiden name: Erratic Assasin (uh-huh)

And the coup-de-grace, the one I'm sticking with:

first name/maiden name: Budget Nudist a.k.a, El Cheapo the Exhibitionist!

See, I knew that becoming "Ann Smith" when I was married was a bad idea. Oh, why did I cave?

-- Anonymous, March 23, 2000

with paul wisham-lesbian pimp masao wisham-monolithic fish monger-x paul masao wisham-inspecta stinkha

-- Anonymous, March 23, 2000

well carol it looks like im on your team,but im the stinky half of a pair.

-- Anonymous, March 23, 2000

Tried plugging in Columbine (only one name, like, y'know, Cher or something) and it didn't like that. So I gave it my real name and was dubbed Cheeky Delinquent.

I can't dispute it.

-- Anonymous, March 23, 2000

Contagious Specialist

-- Anonymous, March 24, 2000

Well, I gave it my birth name, and it told me something-or-other Terrahawk. I was unimpressed because someone else already got terrahawk, and what the f*ck is that, anyway? So, I tried the pen- name I used back when I thought I had something fictional to say, Steven Sikar (never got published), and I was dubbed "Partially Formed Transformuh," which has a certain justice.

Finally, I typed in my new AOL moniker that I picked out just today -- solipsis01 -- and got the result "Grandmaster."

Frankly, I'd rather be solipsis01 -- and by the way, Beth, your site looks great on the new monitor I just bought.

-- Anonymous, March 24, 2000

first i typed in my first and last name and it showed me my wu-name which is: "my cousin the wife beatah".. sounds kind of wak, but atleat it isnt as wak as my friends name which is: "lesbian pimp".. ha ha.. well thats it from me. biyee!!!

-- Anonymous, April 23, 2001

8 Legged DJ

-- Anonymous, May 06, 2001

sweetend exycutor

-- Anonymous, May 07, 2001

Ungrateful Ninja. Odd response from wushu men -- would expect something more like "Bad Mutha Daoist".

-- Anonymous, June 29, 2001

Profound Magician

-- Anonymous, August 05, 2001

My name was Spunky Misunderstood Genius, which was erm....interesting. My friend James Mugleston became Dizzy Cow, and his brother Victorian Cow, and his mum International Cow, which means that 'Mugleston' is 'Cow' in Wu-Tang...lol.

-- Anonymous, August 09, 2001

Mine Was MASTER COW

-- Anonymous, August 10, 2001