how do you stop the abuser if he keeps beating you and you have noone to ask for help?

-- Anonymous, October 12, 1999

Answers

I've got the SAFE-support list going again, so I suggest if you're not on that mailing list, you join (it's on the help page of SAFE).

I would concentrate more on making yourself safe than stopping him. As a woman, you do have a lot of legal protection (you can get a restraining order very easily, and women's shelters will hide you and advocate for you if you contact them).

The hardest thing for you might be to get to the point where you're ready to leave. You should do some planning and research to make sure you do it safely and that you are supported to stay out of the relationship.

I suggest reading through as much as you can on the net, and asking a lot of questions of people who have been through it all, in safe-support.

I hope that helps.

-- Anonymous, October 13, 1999

The womens shelters will not 'under any condition' help a man. The response that I have recieved from the shelters is that men are not abused. Women do not attack men and therefore do not need a shelter. Men have all the money and can get a place anywhere that they want. One shelter said that I was harrassing them and to leave them along or they would file charges. Well I do not have any money, my wife controlled that. My friends have been threatened about hiding me.

-- Anonymous, April 11, 2000