And you're both right -- those high school people can kiss my butt.

-- Anonymous, October 06, 1999

Answers

Liz said... BTW -- I LOVE your hair! It looks great! You're going to knock everyone dead at the reunion! And don't worry -- the IDEA of a high school reunion is much more frightening than the actual gathering. Contrary to popular belief, most people have actually grown up somewhat.

-- Anonymous, October 06, 1999

And you're both right -- those high school people can kiss my butt. I'm really pretty nervous about it, but I'm lucky to have Leora and Jodi going as well. The six of us will stick together and that will make it bearable. And I'd bet at least one of those stupid blonde popular girls will be eight feet wide with four kids and a husband with no teeth.

-- Anonymous, October 06, 1999

Elizabeth wrote....

My actual high school reunion (the school I graduated from, after only having been there one year) is in two weeks, and I was going back and forth about going, but some guy from my class called me last night and I went ahead and said yes. It was difficult, considering the body image problems I've been having (therapy is today, THANK GOD), but now that I decided to go I'm happy about it. I won't have the backup that Colleen will have, b/c I haven't kept in touch with ANYONE, but I think I'll be fine. If there's one group of people who won't care about what I look like or that I'm not married with 2.3 kids, it's this group. They're a big bunch of smart rich hippie liberals (at least they were when they were in high school!)

-- Anonymous, October 06, 1999

Shit, I think I messed up this thread when I copied it out of the emails.

I distinctly remember getting all kinds of cool support for my impending reunion in three days!

I know in my head that it doesn't matter that I'm not married, or have kids, or even engaged. But when I get back in that space I was in high school I feel inferior to those people.

I'm pretty sure it's going to be fine, and if it isn't I'll leave!

I'm just so mad/upset at Dave about the whole engagement thing that it's affecting everything.

-- Anonymous, October 06, 1999

Mine is tomorrow night and you guys can expect to hear about it on Sunday.

I'm scared out of my mind! I have the same fears you did, Liz, that I just won't stack up with what everyone else is doing. And all I can think about is the things I don't have -- a husband or any kids.

But I've got three dogs and an awesome boyfriend and a good job and I make good money, so I shouldn't be worried. But I Am.

Leora and I are going to meet at her hotel and have a couple of beers before we go and we're going in together.

But Elizabeth, even though you have to go alone, I think you should go. I know how scared you are, because I am too. But I know you'll be sorry if you don't go. I know there must be at least one person you'd like to see.

And besides, if it sucks and it's as bad as we fear, we can just LEAVE and go back to our lives that we know are wonderful.

And just remember, there are plenty of other people who are scared too!

-- Anonymous, October 08, 1999

Good for you! I can't wait to hear all about it!

-- Anonymous, October 06, 1999

Aw! You know and I've always been a little jealous that you can carry off short hair so well, Melissa! I've been wavering between keeping my hair long and cutting it short for months and I keep chickening out because I'm afraid that I'll look dorky with short hair. And every time this happens, I always end up saying, "If only I knew my hair would look as fabulous as Melissa's, then I'd cut it short in a minute!"

-- Anonymous, October 06, 1999

Good luck at your reunion tonight, Colleengirl! : )

Don't worry too much about going! Just relax and be your great self and you'll have a fabulous time. Like I should be giving advice....you should have seen the state I was in while I was driving to mine! ;)

Although, it all turned out to be not even half as scary as I thought it would be, so maybe I can give advice on this one!

Have fun! Take pictures!

-- Anonymous, October 08, 1999

Can't wait to hear about it, Collgirl! (Oh wait, I wasn't going to call you that.) I'll need some pointers... I'm starting to waver in my decision to go to mine. I'm such a chicken.

-- Anonymous, October 08, 1999

Oh no, Elizabeth, you HAVE to go! Believe me, if you don't, you'll find yourself wondering what it would have been like.

Gee, I never thought I would find myself being so pro-high school reunion! But, I was the same way before I went to mine. I almost told my mom to forget it and take me home as we were driving there. Of course, since she had just bought me a dress and shoes, there was no way I wasn't going, but still, I felt like I was going to my execution instead of going to stand around in a ballroom, eating pasta salad and drinking gin and tonics with people I used to see nearly every day of my life for four years.

Although, when I was considering my options, sometimes the execution sounded a little easier. ;)

But once I got there, it was like I couldn't believe I had anything to be worried about. Actually, that's the really good thing about going back. Mostly I was horrifically worried that somehow I wouldn't measure up to what my classmates had become, that I would show up and everyone would mock me for what a slacker I was. And then I got there and saw that nobody in that room was really doing anything that spectacular. Sure, some of them were making more money than me, but I had plans (still do) for grad school and writing and my life and most of them just had jobs and kids. It really helped to put things in perspective for me, to show me that whatever I was doing with my life was okay because it made me happy.

Plus, you'll be surprised at how nice people are. Sure, there were still some real jerks there, who thought they were too cool for everybody else, but most people who come back are just normal, nice people who are genuinely interested in how their old classmates are doing. It was a nice ego boost to have so many people remember me fondly and ask about my writing.

Anyway, my opinion is that you should go! And don't worry how you stack up against other people because you're great! Other people should be worrying how they stack up against you!

-- Anonymous, October 08, 1999

Colleen,

You go to that reunion, and don't let anything keep you from having a good time. No matter what happened in high school, you have made a wonderful life for yourself. You have a house and a guy who loves you and a definite career, and you look terrific--even if you do have those self-body issues we all have! Go in and make them all think how great you are, just like we do, and then come home and tell us all about which bitchy girls got fat and which popular kids are losers. :-) That's what I'll do next

-- Anonymous, October 08, 1999