Fourth birth...but you would think it was my first!

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Hi! I have three children...two by epi and other medical intervention, the last by c/s. We will be trying for number 4 shortly and we really want to go the natural route. With the first two, I was swept into the mainstream medical way of L&D, and was a bit naive and did not think to ask any questions. We took education classes from the drs. office and did not know anything of a birth plan or options during labor. With my third child (and second husband) I educated myself a bit more, but did not feel really comfortable (but still a lot ignorant) until we found a wonderful group of CNMs in my 30th week! Needless to say, we were referred to an ob b/c of breech presentation and was scheduled for c/s in my 39th week. Well, I thought if I started asking questions this time before conception..we could really try to understand and learn the way to a natural childbirth...

Does anyone have suggestions for us??? We live in the Spokane, WA area...I would like to find a doula and a birthing class that will actually show us how to work as a team and that will teach me how to get in tune with my body and all that. We now face the added stress of this being an attempted VBAC. Ugh! Some words of encouragement and advice would be wonderful!!

Thank you, Camille

-- Camille Eldridge (toroblee@odessaoffice.com), March 22, 1999

Answers

Hi! You live in a wonderful place to have the birth of your choice! I would recommend looking for a childbirth educator that works outside of the hospital and who is dedicated to helping you have a natural birth. I, personally, like the Bradley method. There may be ALACE intructors or Birthworks in the area which would also be good. If you were lucky there might be a VBAC group you could join. Please, don't think of this as an "attempt." No matter what this is your birth and you will do it. It will be a success. If you do all the planning you seem to be working towards you will know you've done all you can to make it go your way. You can start interviewing doulas early so that you know you've found someone who feels right to you and will help you with your goals. DONA (doulas of north america) is very big in your area. They can connect you with a doula near you. They can be reached at www.dona.org. Good luck and have fun planning!!

-- Kirsten Gerrish (kirsten@doula.net), March 23, 1999.

Kirsten's right! Don't think of this birth as an attempt. You can do it. There are so many ways to help yourself feel confident and ready. Find a good childbirth class and doula you feel great with. Read. Some good books are: Natural Childbirth after Cesarean, The Birth Book, and Childbirth Without Fear. You can also contact your local Le Leche League for good referrals for careproviders and childbirth classes. Also, once you find a good class ask the instructor for an honest opinion about your careprovider and choice for place of birth. Good Luck! Your body was meant to give birth! Lesley

-- Lesley Nelson (lesey@doula.net), March 27, 1999.

I, too, am expecting a fourth child (April, 2000). Having my first child (1982), I was totally ignorant on the subject of childbirth to say the least! I checked in the hospital (much too early) when my water broke and didn't deliver until the next morning. At that time, most ob/gyn practitioners used saddle/caudal/spinal block techniques. This I now know I did not need inasmuch as when the baby's head was crowning (and I literally sat on her head), at this point the doctor hurriedly administered that nasty needle in my back. I had endured all of the pain, withstanding everything I could bear, and at the last few moments, I felt nothing so far as pain but I did finally enjoy the sight of my first baby. My second child was born Valentine's Day, 1997. My husband and I had undergone an updated childbirth class since our first baby and we were better prepared emotionally as well as physically. We both held the strength and stamina to experience the true joy and spiritual meaning of birth! This child was born with no anesthetics whatsoever. My doctor stated to me he was proud of me because so very little women nowdays have "natural childbirth". I simply replied, "natural childbirth" to me is a spiritual process as is life itself. Our third child was born August, 1998 (we finally got a boy). My labor was induced at 6:00 a.m. and I delivered at 8:00 a.m. Labor was fierce and so God awful painful that I begged for (and did receive) an Epidural; and because of the late administration thereof, I still had severe pain. In hindsight, I know that this was a mistake. I know that I was not emotionally or physically prepared for this birth. I am thankful for the ob/gyn I now have. However, I do know that I am the boss (and baby, of course), and accordingly I am in control of my birthing decisions. I am going to try to be better prepared for and ready to give birth to my fourth child in April, 2000, and look forward to this "natural [childbirth]" experience. We who give birth (and all those who graciously assist) should remember our spirituality in giving birth as it is itself life!

-- Belinda Tupper (GTU00???@aol.com), August 31, 1999.

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