ok i should start with some backround. i'm ugly and stupid for the most part. i can't get a date so i have resorted to whacking off, but as of late something very odd has happened. when it come's time to ejaculate...i can no longer ejaculate....instead i.....flatulate....i was wacking to some scat pictures one day....and as i was about to ejaculate semen....i flatulated....my dildo flew out of my ass and i felt so ashamed, is there any reason for this? is my body telling me something? have i run out of semen and my body refuses to make any more? please help will, i want to ejaculate semen again, it feels so much better than flatulating

-- ryan epperson (repperso@sal.mhasd.k12.wi.uw), March 06, 1999

Answers

Well, here's how it is. You have what we, in the business, call a "problem". You seem to be looking for a solution. Either you can learn to like this new form of release that your body is giving you as gratification, or you can stop "whacking off".

Or of course, just die. I've seen a lot of posts from you, and you seem to need more help than just some lowly guy like me can give.

-- William Baguhn (spqrspqr@hotmail.com), March 07, 1999.

i believe your body rejects extra curricular exploring of your anus. flatulating is your body's way of telling you it doesn't like dildos, small rodents, and fingers. I'm sure anal stimulation feels wonderful to you but it must stop. As a rule of thumb, if your body only excretes things from an oriface, don't put things in that oriface. you wouldn't go shoving a q-tip in the tip of your penis would you? as a rule your ass is "Exit Only". Hopefully the problem will clear up in due time, your body is just having a reaction to too much anal penetration

-- Pud (alandmar@cs.nmsu.edu), March 07, 1999.

Because you're another damn transgendered jehova, your privates don't work. What do you expect from nothing?

Stop practicing your religion, and grow a dick already.

Oh, btw -- do you have any more free computers for me to sell? Just leave them at Pud's house and I'll take them from there. Thanks.

-- Max Harris (adm@fsdevel.com), March 08, 1999.